It’s been a week since the couple who personified the definition of everlasting love, Pete Davidson and Ariana Grande, pulled the plug and broke up. Ariana went back into work performing at a pre-taped NBC segment celebrating Wicked, but Pete had been keeping a low-ish profile. Until now. And what does Pete finally have to say about the break up? Did he continue to barf out TMI details like how they broke up because his supposedly enormous 10-inch dick kept getting stuck in her Cupcake Surprise Princess-sized doll body and the fire department had to get them apart? Surprisingly: no.
Most people want to deal with a breakup in one of two ways: bone everything that shows up within 175 miles on Grindr or guzzle a case of red wine, listen to Faith Hill, and sob on the couch. I’ve done both. Ariana Grande (seen above with Idina Menzel), however, still stuck to a work commitment and performed for a pre-taped segment on NBC’s upcoming anniversary special for Wicked following her breakup with Pete Davidson. Pete, however, gave a hard pass to performing at Temple University’s homecoming. Continue reading
Pete Davidson and Ariana Grande may have broken up for the first time (that we know of; only sweet baby Jebus knows if it will be their last), but that doesn’t mean Ariana is sleeping alone at night. While the intense fire of her and Pete’s relationship may have dampened, she’s still in a committed relationship with a bed shitter. According to TMZ, Piggy Smalls, the couple’s micro pig, will stay with Ariana. TMZ says that while they were together when they “adopted” Piggy, Ariana “bought” her herself, which means Piggy actually is hers and hers alone. So not only were these two guilty of high crimes of TMI, they also dabbled in questionable pig trafficking practices.
In news that shocked literally every living human alive on the planet today, tomorrow and ever in time, Ariana Grande and Pete Davidson broke up this weekend. I know, I was shocked as the rest of you. TMZ is now saying that they have insight into what broke up the couple and shockingly it’s not because Pete wouldn’t stop talking about what the inside of her vagina looked like.
Nobody has won Powerball or Mega Millions, and their jackpots have hit $345 million and $654 million, respectively. But if you put money on “October 14, 2018″ as the day it’s announced that a priest gives the last rites to the meaning of True Love, then you’re already a big winner. Although, honestly, we’re all losers today since it’s obvious there’s no such thing as everlasting love.
Usually an Ariana Grande video features her whipping that ponytail back and forth and forgetting how to pronounce at least a third of the consonants in her lyrics. That has made it where I honestly can’t tell the difference in any of her videos, but Ariana is on to my ass. “Breathin” is the latest single off her latest album, and the video finally dropped. BUT! Instead of featuring herself in the video, Ariana put in her pet pig Piggy Smalls!
Based on the film quality, I guess the Grande family still has a Panasonic VHS handheld recorder because it looks like this was a straight-up DIY music video set. It looks like it was shot at the apartment Ariana shares with Pete Davidson. Piggy is a new addition to the Grande-Davidson household, as Ariana only just started showing him off on Instagram in September. Pete has already gotten a tattoo of him, which shouldn’t surprise anyone. I just hope they show the same kind of love to their bird: TuSquawk. I know, I know: I’ll let myself out.