Birthday Sluts

/ April 26, 2019
Carol Burnett (86)
Luke Bracey (30)
Jemima Kirke (34)
Ms. Dynamite (38)
Jordana Brewster (39)
Channing Tatum (39)
Stana Katic (41)
Pablo Schreiber (41)
Fredrik Eklund (42)
Tom Welling (42)
Mckenzie Westmore (42)
Joey Joridson (44)
Shondrella Avery (48)
T-Boz (49)

Pic: CBS/Getty

Jacqueline Laurita (49)
Melania Trump (49)
Kane (52)
Marianne Jean-Baptiste (52)
Kevin James (54)
Jet Li (56)
Michael Damian (57)
Debra Wilson (57)
Joan Chen (58)
Roger Taylor (59)
Giancarlo Esposito (61)
Giorgio Moroder (79)
Duane Eddy (81)
I.M. Pei (102)
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Night Crumbs

/ April 25, 2019

While Prince William is in New Zealand and Duchess Meghan waits to give birth, Duchess Kate put on her version of “Whoopi Goldberg going to the bank in Ghost” look to attend Anzac Day service at Westminster Abbey with Prince Hot Ginge. DK and PHG have totally given the British tabloids a picture for when they really get bored and run the story: Kate Gets Back At Cheating Will By Having An Illicit Affair With His Brother! – Lainey Gossip

Lily Collins looks like she’s modeling Endora’s favorite freakum dress – Popoholic

Scary Spice is looking over like she wants to hit that Ginger Spice hotness again (or for the first time if you ask Ginger Spice) – SOW

Brit Brit Spears is apparently out of treatment and back at Chateau de Frapp – The Blast

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John Singleton Is Reportedly In A Coma After Suffering A Stroke 

/ April 25, 2019

Over the weekend, we learned the awful news that Oscar-nominated director John Singleton was in the hospital after having a stroke. We were told that the stroke was a “minor” one and it seemed like he was going to recover. But it seems like sources got things wrong, sadly, and John’s stroke wasn’t so minor. TMZ has now updated the awful news about John with worse news. They say he’s in a coma.

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Johnny Depp Has Found New Love With A Russian Go-Go Dancer

/ April 25, 2019

Johnny Depp is reportedly dating, and wants to marry, a Russian “go-go dancer” who is absolutely, 100%, assuredly, verifiable, and without a doubt not interested in his money. Like, not at all. Put the ridiculous idea out of your head immediately. You should be ashamed for even thinking that in the first place. According to The Daily Mail, Polina Glenwas just chilling” at a party in L.A. when Johnny strolled into her life. She didn’t even know who he was! That was probably sometime last year. Now she lives in his house and a source says they’re making plans for Johnny to meet her parents in Russia.

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Open Post: Hosted By Chickendales Led By Magic Sanders

/ April 25, 2019

KFC US saw KFC Hong Kong’s popcorn-infused popcorn chicken and pfft’d at it, because they knew they were about to make pussies pop (or cringe, depending on what your kink is) for Mother’s Day. Buff Colonel Sanders wants moms to bust out some coochie gravy this Mother’s Day and so KFC has teamed up with Chippendales, which is fitting since both pump their main products up with hormones.

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Bill Cosby Asks The Superior Court For Bail While He Appeals His Conviction

/ April 25, 2019

It sounds like things aren’t going quite as well for Bill Cosby in prison as he had previously let on. Last we heard he was adored by all, feeling great, and luxuriating in the prestige that only comes with being an imprisoned civil rights hero and a political martyr. But all of a sudden he wants out. Like real, real bad. Like he dropped his harmonica down the toilet and his cellmate stole his stamps bad.

Bill’s been trying to appeal his sexual assault conviction since the gavel dropped, but he’s just filed a request for bail with the Superior Court so he can shit in private while that’s happening. Bill’s also released a statement explaining why he should never have had his toilet paper rationed in the first place. He’s a political prisoner don’t you know, and the racist judge is out to get him! Plus now there’s corn in his harmonica. Bill doesn’t even remember eating corn!

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