Afternoon Crumbs

/ November 12, 2018

Jaden Smith declared at a festival hosted by Tyler, The Creator, that Tyler is his motherfucking boyfriend and has been his motherfucking boyfriend his whole life. Um, okay, but I thought that Jaden was already married to the moon and the ethereal thoughts of wisdom that he speaks were actually orgasm streams he lets out while humping his lover (I swear I’m not on the same shit as Jaden). But if Tyler is Jaden’s man, then congrats, and can he please hand his motherfucking boyfriend, a motherfucking Sharpie, because those motherfucking alien-on-meth peroxide brows are terrifying – Towleroad

Heidi Klum gives her cow milk fetishist fans some fap material – Drunken Stepfather 

When a cast member from a TLC shit show gets arrested, the TLC casting agent who hired them gets its wings (read: a bonus) – Reality Tea 

I see that celebrities brought out their bottom of the barrel ensembles for a bottom of the barrel awards show – Celebitchy

Counter: why you SHOULD install your own stripper people (because you can get some quick YouTube fame by busting your ass) – SOW

Just when I was starting to think that it’s been much too long (like 2 hours) since I’ve seen Emily RideAJetSki’s nalgitas, Emily RideAJetSki’s nalgitas pop up – Hollywood Tuna 

Here’s Kat Dennings serving up some big-tittied Morticia Addams eleganza – Popoholic

No wonder Michelle Williams doesn’t want to fuck her fiancé – Pajiba

Kanye West and Kim Kardashian supposedly hired “private firefighters” to save their mansion – Just Jared

Pic: Wenn.com

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Juicy Joe Is Appealing To Stay In The U.S.

/ November 12, 2018

New Jersey may not be completely devoid of one of its more prominent meatballs. Juicy Joe, the bear responsible for Teresa Giudice spending 2015 in the slammer, got some not-so-great news a few weeks ago from a federal judge. It’s Joe’s turn in jail for committing fraud, and an immigration judge let him know he was being sent back to Italy at the end his prison term since he never became a U.S. citizen despite living here since he as only a one-year-old. While Teresa may have heralded the news that would finally get rid of all that whey protein and pre-workout mix from the pantry (I’m kidding – she was devastated at the thought of losing a member of her onyx palace), Joe isn’t taking the news lying down. He filed an appeal to prevent being shipped back to his mother country.

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Open Post: Hosted By Nicki Minaj Thirsting After Michael B. Jordan

/ November 12, 2018

You might say she’s a fan of Black Panther. Last night was the PR Paid For This People’s Choice Awards on E!, and the award winner for Female Artist of 2018 and Album of the Year may not have been well-received in Cardi B’s camp. Nicki Minaj won both, but rather than taunt her usual sparring partner (there’s plenty of time for that in Part 900 of Queen Radio!), she seemed to be telling the world she was horny as hell.

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Stan Lee Has Died

/ November 12, 2018

If I’m going to write about the news that comic book legend Stan Lee has died, I may as well include a picture of Hulkbuster crotch.

Stan Lee, who I thought would live until the end of eternity, is now making his way to the great big Comic-Con in the afterworld after he died today in Los Angeles. Stan’s daughter tells TMZ that he was taken by ambulance from his home in the Hollywood Hills to Cedars-Sinai Medical Center this morning, and that’s where he died. He was 95 years old.

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Johnny Galecki And His 21-Year-Old Girlfriend Made Their Red Carpet Debut

/ November 12, 2018

Between the tired nerd jokes and the sad laugh track, I don’t exactly envy the cast of The Big Bang Theory. But I do envy their fat paychecks, and of course I envy anyone who gets to live a lavish life by dating a BBT cast member, like Johnny Galecki’s current girlfriend, who just made their relationship red carpet official by showing up at the People’s Choice Awards in Santa Monica, CA last night together.

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