Category: Night Crumbs
Night Crumbs

Laura Jeanne Poon has pulled that old-fashioned “sweep divorce news under the rug by releasing it on a Friday” PR move. Reese Witherspoon and her husband, Jim Toth, announced today that they’ve made the “difficult decision to divorce” after almost 12 years of marriage (their 12th wedding anniversary is on Sunday). Reese and Jim went on to say that they’re focused on co-parenting their 10-year-old son Tennesse James Toth, and sources add that there’s no drama behind the split. Well, I’m definitely pouring one out for the end of this marriage because if it wasn’t for Reese and Jim’s union, we would never have her iconically messy “This is BEYOND” arrest videos – People
I guess Robert Downey, Jr. got bored with sipping liquid gold while lounging on an Hermès floatie in a pool filled with his Iron Man money because he will produce and possibly star in a reboot of Alfred Hitchcock’s Vertigo. Obviously, RDJ doesn’t know Vertigo that well, because he didn’t get the movie’s message about the dangers of recreating the past! But I see that RDJ is sick of playing the superhero all the time and wants to be the villain for once by butchering a masterpiece – Variety
Night Crumbs

It’s been almost a year since Shakira and Gerard Piqué split, and he turned his side piece, Clara Chia Marti, into his main piece. Gerard is talking about the break-up now, and you won’t find him shedding one tear over the demise of his relationship with the mother of his two children over his cheating ways. Because trick doesn’t give a fuck! During an interview with Spanish publication El País, Gerard declared that he’s “very happy” and that “I keep doing what I want. The day I die, I will look back and hope I have always done what I wanted.” And if that’s not enough, he said that he wants to be “faithful” to himself. That sounds like something out of a TED Talk sponsored by AshleyMadison.com. If his wandering peen could high-five him for that interview, it would. And all the shameless cheaters of the world better bow down to Gerard Piqué because he is your Jesus now – Jezebel
Speaking of cheaters… The ho stroll’s couple of the moment, Amy Robach and TJ Holmes, are reportedly still trying to sell a talk show hosted by them. So far, major networks like CBS and CNN have passed on the pitch, and a source says it’s because “nobody is going to watch them. America does not like adulterers.” Um, okay, but America has voted cheaters into office before. But maybe Amy and TJ’s people are pitching their show all wrong. They should sell it by saying, “Think of what the ratings will be when Amy and TJ’s relationship implodes on live TV after the lust wears off.” I mean, Andy Cohen’s tip would get moist from that sentence alone – Lainey Gossip
Night Crumbs

Aaron Sorkin suffered a stroke last November, and it had to do with a little something called “being 61 years old and still smoking two packs a day and eating whatever the hell he wanted.” The stroke nearly ended Aaron’s writing career and was a wake-up call for him to turn his health around. He’s doing better now and hopes to write a January 6th movie. Okay, so a stroke nearly took out his writing career, and he responds by wanting to write a January 6th movie?! We’ve already seen that movie (aka watching the news), Aaron, and we don’t need a damn reboot of it! – Pajiba
Today, you won’t find Doja Cat shaving her brows off on a Livestream because she’ll be too busy making out with her chichis, which she just got reduced – Lainey Gossip
Night Crumbs

The Great Celebrity Bake Off is currently airing in the UK, and on Sunday’s episode, judge Prue Leith may have once again let people know to never ever call her PRUDE Leith by wearing what looked like a ball gag as a necklace. And this isn’t the first, second, third, or fourth time that Prue may have let her freak flag fly in the form of an elegant little ball gag necklace. Viewers have noticed it before. Never mind that it’s so small that it looks like a ball gag for Kevin Hart; Prue once said on the show that she often needs “two holes” so that she can “squirt.” So Prue knows what she’s doing! Besides, she probably also wears a ball gag necklace just in case she really needs something to shut Paul Hollywood up with! – Pajiba
The Kartrashian Koven’s kurse on all of humanity continues as Kim Kardashian’s unholy presence may have cursed a football match in Paris – Celebitchy
Night Crumbs

90s Con happened in Hartford, CT, over the weekend, bringing out three of the four stars of the original Charmed. Shannen Doherty, Rose McGowan, and Holly Marie Combs all made an appearance at the Charmed panel, but Alyssa Milano sat that one out (and probably because Alyssa didn’t want to get jumped by both Shannen and Rose!). Even without Alyssa, there was a little drama during the panel, though. When the Charmed reboot was brought up, some in the audience booed, and Shannen wasn’t having it. Shannen let the boo-ers know that wasn’t “cool” and added, “Don’t boo to people who supply literally hundreds and hundreds of people with their job.” And as she said that, I’m sure that noted Charmed reboot-hater Holly silently mouthed to the audience, “Don’t listen to her; keep booing.” – People
A stage production of Brokeback Mountain will open in London in May, and it’ll star Lucas Hedges and Mike Faist. It’s not a musical, but there will be music and choreography. So prepare to see Lucas and Mike do the butt sex ballet as a chorus of giant canned beans gracefully dance around them – Queerty
Night Crumbs

The Tonight Show found a way to make their show 10000% more watchable without completely getting rid of “pick me” host Jimmy Fallon. Just add a happy Keanu Reeves and a pile of PUPPEHS, and there you go! Even noted Keanu Reeves hater Matthew Perry would crack a small smile at this before muttering under his breath, “And I bet Keanu kicked one of those puppies too afterward.” – Uproxx
Rachel Zegler was asked why she signed on to do DC’s Shazam! Fury of Gods, and instead of burping up a load of bullshit like “the script spoke to my artistic sensibilities and I’ve always been an avid learner of Greek mythology,” she kept it real by admitting she did it for a check – Celebitchy