Not really sure why, but 2022 has marked the return of the Revenge Dress, whatever that is. At least it’s a less gruesome resurgence than the Revenge Body Khloe Kardashian tried to bring back post-Tristan Thompson, whatever that means. But there is a time and a place for a Revenge Dress and apologies to Olivia Wilde, but it is not the People’s Choice Awards, whatever those are. However, according to E! News, Olivia channeled Princess Diana last night by having “her very own revenge dress movement” when she stepped out on the red carpet with her nipples showing for her
first second red carpet appearance since breaking up with Prince Harry (Styles) three years weeks ago. Now don’t get me wrong, showing your nipples is a great way to get revenge, but the PCAs? Against Him? Honey, no. Generally speaking, that angry bearded man with the gloves in that GIF is always right, but in this case, I’m gonna have to disagree and say that, at the People’s Choice Awards, for once, the rent is too damn low!
Last week, the news broke that Olivia Wilde (Nips McGee on the right) and Harry Styles (Star Wars baddie on the left) had split. Well, the exact language was, “they’re on a break.” Sure. Now People is reporting that a source claims the couple’s break up is “difficult” for Olivia, and she’s “disappointed.” Um. That’s it? No more details? Sigh. I don’t know about you, but after the highs and lows of the Jason Sudeikis/Don’t Worry Darling drama, the end of Wilde n’ Stylez is totally underwhelming. I want to read about Olivia throwing a bottle of salad dressing in Harry’s face. I want to see paparazzi pics of Harry wearing the “Miss Flo” T-shirt. I
want need mess, goddammit! But, so far… nada.
Crack one open for delusional Harry Styles stans because he’s back on the market! Yes, the love story that captivated a news cycle is over. After two years of putting on a show for the paps, Olivia Wilde and Harry have officially called it quits. They survived the news stories about their questionable dating timeline, Jason Sudeikis allegedly throwing himself under a car, and Miss Flo’s grossed out gaze, but they couldn’t survive getting bored with each other’s asses. Who will be privy to Olivia’s special salad dressing now?!
Billie Eilish And Her Boyfriend Jesse Rutherford Made Their Red Carpet Debut At The LACMA Art + Film Gala
A successful, independent young woman like Billie Eilish can’t be expected to go around twinning with her brother every time she’s got a red carpet event to dress for. In fact, it starts to look a little weird after a while. Billie seems to understand that now and used the annual LAMCA Art + Film Gala to take the opportunity to make her twinning red carpet debut with her boyfriend, The Neighbourhood frontman Jesse Rutherford. Unfortunately, Billie chose the wrong event because there was another set of twins on the red carpet that not only completely eclipsed the stars in attendance, but they also eclipsed the very moon and sun that shine above. Sure Billie and Jesse looked cute shrouded in a Gucci comforter over matching Gucci pajamas, but even one unprotected glance at Salma Hayek’s twin gaseous orbs has the power to render the viewer blind.
Pour one out for Fran Drescher because if anybody’s legacy is going to be tarnished by the Don’t Worry Darling Disaster of 2022, it’s Fran who has lost the distinction of being the most loquacious professional child care provider of the modern era. Even worse, nowadays, when someone mentions “the nanny” in passing, they’re gonna have to be more specific- like are we walking about the show or Olivia Wilde and Jason Sedeikis’ nanny because either way, yeah, quite a mouth on her, eh? The Daily Mail published a third installment of their What Me Worry? interview with No, Not That The Nanny, who now claims that Florence Pugh hooked up with Harry Styles before Olivia did, and that is what really drove a wedge between Miss Flo and Miss Oh?. Mr. Him? could not be reached for comment.
Jason Sudeikis’ Ex-Girlfriend, Keeley Hazell, Might Have Shaded His Ex-Fiancée, Olivia Wilde, In The Midst Of Salad-Gate
Back in the summer of 2021 when we all thought the break-up of Jason Sudeikis and Olivia Wilde would just be your run-of-the-mill Hollywood relationship demise where both parties cut their losses, keep quiet about it, and start over with a young, hot Brit; Olivia took off with the star of her film Don’t Worry Darling, Harry Styles, and Jason ended up with actress/model, Keeley Hazell. Jason and Keeley broke up earlier this year, and as far as we know, Olivia and Harry are still jointly enjoying their scandalous salad. But since Jason/Olivia/their ex-nanny’s salad-gate exposé is shaping up to be the messiest mess to ever mess (this month), Keeley tapped in to keep the train moving. She took a page from Olivia’s book and also posted an Instagram Story featuring that page from Nora Ephron’s book, Heartburn. This time, it wasn’t to share a much-coveted “special dressing” recipe, but to likely shade the version of events Olivia’s been spinning.