How nice it must have been for her to be in the presence of royalty. After all, it’s not every day that one meets the indisputable Queen of Music, Beyoncé Knowles-Carter. I’m of course kidding, because I’m sure Beyoncé – a noted Duchess of Sussex fan – was also very thrilled to be meeting a royal like Duchess Meghan.
Last year Gotti was the toast of the Cannes International Film festival. OK, maybe calling it the toast is bit of an overstatement, but it was tolerated. So maybe the fact that Rocketman, the Elton John biopic starring lover of the gays Taron Egerton, received a standing ovation at its recent Cannes premiere shouldn’t be a surprise. I’m sure it’s a feel good movie, especially when you’re already feeling good off of free champagne and proximity to sequins. But Taron was moved to tears by the enthusiastic reception. And now his tearful reaction has gone viral on Twitter, much to James Van Der Beek’s relief.
This Rocketman press tour is really giving me more queer-baiting than my gay heart can handle. Seeing lil cute buff alleged hetero, Taron Egerton fall all over himself while talking about how much he loves and supports us gays is really helping me thrive during spring. Like a flower rising from the winter cold, I am being nourished by the homosexual sunshine that is Taron’s need to please us gays. In the current issue of The Hollywood Reporter, Taron is now talking about how kissing dudes is no big deal.
Taron Egerton is on the cover of British GQ and he is talking all about his new Elton John biopic, Rocketman. Namely: how gaaaaaaaaaaay it is going to be and how he’s excited about all the homosexual flamboyance the film will be exuding in theaters this May. Put on your protective glasses because the glitter and rhinestones are going to positively leap at you from the big screens.
Because I’m a yokel from the suburbs of Boston, I was dead chuffed when I was drinking at The Beverly Hills Hotel one afternoon and Courteney Cox, Rachel Zoe, and that guy from Fear The Walking Dead were all wandering around. Monica Geller-Bing read a bar appetizer menu two stools over from me! As pathetic as that sounds, now I wish I hadn’t. Because the Sultan of Brunei owns the hotel, Brunei has recently ok’d punishing homosexual behavior by stoning the “guilty” to death, and George Clooney is now leading a boycott against all of the luxury hotels owned by the Sultan. George Clooney is totally running for president one day and “leading a boycott against a gay-hating Sultan” is a great thing to have on your resume when you want to be the future bleeding heart liberal POTUS. Well, that and “Nespresso machines for all!!!”
It’s already off to the damn races for the 2020 Oscars, and Elton John helped Taron Egerton launch his campaign to become Rami Malek 2.0 last night. Elton always throws a big Oscars bash since it’s his annual big dick contest with Madonna and her own Oscars bash. Taron, who is playing Elton in the upcoming Rocketman, actually sang “Tiny Dancer” at Elton’s party, and El was more than happy to oblige since Madge and Gaga’s publicity stunt couldn’t DARE be the news of the night.