People says that Lil’ Kim has finally got the message after all these years of hosting Real Housewives reunions which he led into catfights, and getting celebrities drunk on his show Watch What Happens Live! to spill their secrets. It seems that Andy Cohen has finally gone too far for Small Kimberly and she’s decided that his “messy” ways are not something she will be a party to–cancelling an upcoming appearance on his late night gossip bitchfest, and a few other media outlets too.
You can always count on any BET red carpet to provide some high fashion “moments”, and last night’s BET Awards was no exception. The MET Gala would have been smart to reference “BET red carpet” when trying to get clueless celebrities to grasp the concept of camp. RuPaul’s zebra suit would have looked right at home given the profusion of sequins, pastels, neon, and sculptural pieces that walked the BET carpet. For example, take aspiring rapper/entrepreneur/wig maker to the stars Cliff Vmir (above). His title alone is plenty camp, but throw in a chartreuse vinyl jumpsuit and top it off with a day-glo Victorian fringed lampshade, you’ve got a weenie roast with s’mores for dessert.
Lil’ Kim Stomped The House Down At The Blonds’ NY Fashion Week Show Where Paris Hilton Also Appeared
Last night, the fashion designer duo, The Blonds, held their annual New York Fashion Week fashion show, and if you think I’ve used the word “fashion” excessively in this sentence, well that’s just a reflection of how much fashion was on display. Not only were the clothes drenched in “Capital F-Fashion”, one model in particular was face fucking the audience with a 24-karat gold fashion strap-on. And even though she still owes me a ligament, I have to hand it to Lil’ Kim, she absolutely brought it on the runway and closed out the show by spraying everybody with a golden shower of high fashion face, funk and body-ody-ody! Paris Hilton was also there.
I guess that means she knows her now? A couple of months ago, Lil’ Kim didn’t want to answer questions about Nicki Minaj. But hot on the heels of the release of Nicki’s new album Queen, Kim decided to talk about their feud and she kept the shade subdued and gentle.
Even though my brother lives there, I tell myself the state of New Jersey is populated only by the Real Housewives and some extras who show up to Kim D.’s Posh fashion show each season (“Fuck you.” – everyone who lives in New Jersey). Well, I guess Lil’ Kim is there, too, but in Real Housewives fashion, she was battling the threat of foreclosure on the mansion she’s struggling to pay for. Kim has managed to save it…but she’s walking on one narrow-ass line to keep it.
The Blast says a judge is giving Kim a second and final chance at having a roof over her head, and if she fucks this up, Nicki Minaj will perform her greatest hits album on the front lawn when the repo man comes and takes the house away. Kidding, kidding…Nicki is too busy making sure Cardi B doesn’t show up on her front lawn and do that.
Kim had to file for Chapter 13 bankruptcy with $4 million in debt and nearly $2 million in back taxes. Erm, maybe her friend Paris Hilton can donate some perfume for her to hawk on eBay and settle her issues with Uncle Sam?
The deal with the house payments is Kim has to immediately pay creditors over $32,000 to settle three missed payments. Going forward, she’ll pay a little over $10,000 each month, and if she misses a single payment, the judge will turn her into the little old woman who lived in her pasties, er, shoe.
Mariah Carey may have decent royalty checks from all ‘dem hits. But she really missed her pot of gold by not hopping in a cab to the trademark office to file a patent for “I don’t know her” immediately after pretending she had no damn clue what a Jennifer Lopez was. If there’s a go-to for celebrity shade, it’s pretending like you know some A-lister about as well as you do someone in suburban Boise who has downloaded all your albums eighteen times on Limewire. Andy Cohen and Martha Stewart have employed the IDKH method, and now Lil’ Kim is revving up her Nicki Minaj feud by pretending to have no idea who the voice behind “Anaconda” is. Hiss hiss, you sneaky snake!
Entertainment Tonight’s Katie Krause caught up with Lil’ Kim on Wednesday night at an event, and asked Kim what she thought of the new crop of female rappers like Cardi B and Nicki Minaj. Kim begins to gush about Cardi, but not before she quickly slid in an “…and I don’t know the other one.”
Oooh, that could have almost been a respectable read to singe everyone’s eyebrows off had it not come while Kim was waiting to get into the launch of Paris Hilton’s new line of whatever. Anyway, I’m beginning to think that “I don’t know her” bit is getting a tad stale for my liking. Call me when one of these chicks has the balls to say, “I do know her, and she’s as enjoyable as a hemorrhoid!”