Birthday Sluts

/ September 18, 2019
James Marsden (46)
Patrick Schwarzenegger (26)
Jinkx Monsoon (32)
Angela Simmons (32)
Keeley Hazell (33)
Danielle Jonas (33)
Nina Arianda (35)
Alison Lohman (40)
Billy Eichner (41)
Barrett Foa (42)
Sara Haines (42)
Ronaldo (43)
Jason Sudeikis (44)
Xzibit (45)
Towanda Braxton (46)
Lance Armstrong (48)
Jada Pinkett Smith (48)

Pic: Instagram

Aisha Tyler (49)
Tara Fitzgerald (52)
Ricky Bell (52)
Holly Robinson Peete (55)
Joanne Catherall (57)
Lori and George Schappell (58)
Jeana Keough (64)
Anna Deavere Smith (69)
Frankie Avalon (79)
Fred Willard (80)
Robert Blake (86)
James Gandolfini (1961-2013)
Dee Dee Ramone (1951-2002)
Satan’s Angel (1944-2019)
June Foray (1917-2017)
Agnes de Mille (1905-1993)
Greta Garbo (1905-1990)
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Dlisted: The Podcast, Episode 57 – Ruh Roh

/ September 18, 2019

Being the highly esteemed film critics that we are, Allison and I start this episode by reviewing Hustlers down to whether or not it had enough soft dick in it. From there, we talk about Felicity Huffman getting a tear drop tattoo while spending 14 days in jail, and Shane Gillis getting the Guinness World Record for going from “new dude on SNL” to “dude who got fired from SNL” in about three seconds.

We also quickly get into the weird union of Zooey Deschanel and a Property Brother, the Whitney Houston hologram hitting the road, women getting their Resting Bitch Face fixed, the horny Hiddlestoner who allegedly had an orgasm during his play, and Ari Linedyke Jr. squirting titty leche onto his eyeball to cure pink eye.

And being the highly-esteemed TV critics that we are, Allison and I end by spending 15 hours predicting the winners of the Emmys. 15 hours is a long time, but the Emmys ceremony is going to be three times longer than that, at least.

Subscribe and rate if you haven’t already! And if you’ve got a tip or advice question, e-mail us at: [email protected]

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Night Crumbs

/ September 17, 2019

When Entertainment Weekly asked Brad Pitt about campaigning to get an Oscar nomination for either Ad Astray (typo and it stays) or Once Upon a Time in Hollywood, he said no thanks and that he’s going to abstain from that game. Honestly, Brad doesn’t need to campaign. Since he’s in The Koven now, he just has to ask Pimp Mama Kris to make a sacrifice to her boss Satan to make a nomination happen. Although, it may be a little awkward when PMK runs into Angelina Jolie as they’re both hunting for virgin sacrifices – Lainey Gossip 

If Kendall Jenner went dirty dishwater blond (apologies to dirty dishwater) to look even more dead in the eyes, it worked! – Celebitchy

The Birds of Prey poster is a dream straight out of the mind of a 90s raver/Hot Topic loyal customer – Pajiba

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NBCUniversal Is Working On A “Saved By The Bell” Sequel Starring Jessie Spano And A.C. Slater

/ September 17, 2019

A few years ago, Elizabeth Berkley and Mario Lopez slipped into their tightest buns-hugging jeans and reunited as Jessie Spano and A.C. Slater for a bit on Jimmy Fallon’s TV show. And that was about as close as we all were going to get to an official Saved by the Bell sequel, reboot, or revival. Until now, that is. I hope they didn’t donate those buns-huggers, because NBCUniversal are bringing Mama and Macho Pig back for a Saved by the Bell sequel.

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Brad Pitt Is A Fan Of Kanye West’s Sunday Service

/ September 17, 2019

Apparently, Brad Pitt got the vapors after attending Kanye West’s Sunday Service in Watts over Labor Day weekend. According to Entertainment Tonight, Brad thinks Kanye’s really onto something special. I mean I get it. We understand that you’re undertaking some sort of rebirth/rebranding/How Floyd Got His Groove Back endeavor, but Brad, honey, step away from The Koven. Kanye’s ego can’t take it. One more compliment from a famous white man he admires and his head is going to explode, covering all of Calabasas county in a thick miasma of half-baked ideas and ear wax.

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