Open Post: Hosted By Gritty The Lifeguard

/ July 21, 2019

Philadelphia Flyers mascot and former HSOTD Gritty needed a summer job because you don’t play hockey when it’s (literally) 100° out. So he got one as a lifeguard in the Stranger Things universe, as demonstrated by the mash-up clip after the cut. And Gritty’s making everyone at the pool wet and I’m not just talking about the water if you smell what I’m stepping in.

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David Crosby Either Angrily Left Or Was Thrown Out Of A Podcast Interview

/ July 21, 2019

60s folk-rock icon David Crosby (The Byrds, Crosby, Stills & Nash, etc.) is one of those Keith Richards-level music immortals who everyone wonders how they’re still operating on this plane of existence with what they’ve done with their bodies over the years. Dude’s current issues, according to the New Yorker, include “eight stents in his heart, diabetes, hepatitis C, and a transplanted liver.” It’s commonly acknowledged that he’s not going to be around for much longer. So it’s understandable that he might be a little cranky. The Hollywood Reporter’s Scott Feinberg recently discovered this while interviewing Crosby, 77, for THR’s Awards Chatter podcast to promote Cameron Crowe’s new documentary on Crosby, David Crosby: Remember My Name.

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Pete Davidson Really Wants His Mom To Get Laid

/ July 21, 2019

If you hadn’t had your daily serving of inappropriate content from misguided celebrities with pseudo-Oedipal psychosexual leanings just yet, here ya go. Page Six reports that SNL’s Pete Davidson has expressed his feeling that his mom isn’t having enough sex. He lives with her. For now. Mrs. Davidson might want to start sending him Craigslist links to places he can rent so he can GTFO of the house and stop being way too into what her vagine is up to. THAT’S YOUR MOM, Pete!

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Marvel Cinematic Universe Shit: Angelina Jolie Is An “Eternal,” Natalie Portman Is The New Thor

/ July 21, 2019

Never mind earthquakes. California was nearly taken out yesterday by the tsunami of fanboy drool created by Marvel Studios announcing all of their upcoming movie and TV offerings at San Diego Comic-Con. Angelina Jolie sashayed out to get that Marvel money and officially joined the cast of The Eternals. Natalie Portman deigned to make an appearance to announce that she’s going to be the new female Thor. Marvel also exhibited their absolute fearlessness when they revealed that they’ve recast Blade with Oscar winner Mahershala Ali. Their security must be aces because Noxeema Jackson is going to show up with an uzi when she hears that she’s not getting any cash from Marvel anytime soon with which to pay off her outstanding IRS tab.

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Hot Slut Of The Day!

/ July 21, 2019

Spider-Jermaine, the real-life Spider-Man from Philadelphia who scaled a building during a fire to save his bed-ridden mom!

I’ve said, “Yeah, okay, whatever you want,” to my mom when she’s asked me if we can watch an Adam Sandler movie while hanging out. So because of those soul-killing sacrifices I’ve made to honor my mother’s wishes, I thought that made me the mama’s boy of all mama’s boys. But I was wrong. Jermaine has me beat, because he flirted with death to help his mom. Although, honestly, I’d rather climb up a burning building than watch another damn Adam Sandler movie.

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Birthday Sluts

/ July 21, 2019
Betty Gilpin (33)
Sara Sampaio (28)
Rory Culkin (30)
Chelsie Hightower (30)
Juno Temple (30)
Jamie Waylett (30)
Diane Guerrero (33)
Vanessa Lengies (34)
Paloma Faith (38)
Blake Lewis (38)
Justin Bartha (41)
Josh Hartnett (41)
Damian Marley (41)< strong>Pic: Netflix
Jaime Murray (43)
Alex Reid (44)
Ali Landry (46)
Charlotte Gainsbourg (48)
Alysia Reiner (49)
Brandi Chastain (51)
Jon Lovitz (62)
Yusuf Islam aka Cat Stevens (71)
Norman Jewison (93)
Robin Williams (1951-2014)
Edward Herrmann (1943-2014)
Janet Reno (1938-2016)
Don Knotts (1924-2006)
Ernest Hemingway (1899-1961)
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