Elton John Came To Prince Harry And Duchess Meghan’s Defense For Using Private Jets

/ August 19, 2019

Prince Harry and Duchess Meghan are always on the British press’ shit list, but they were really on it this weekend over their use of private planes. The British press pulled receipts for Harry and Meghan’s recent private jet travel, which some think is hypocritical, considering how vocal they are about climate change and environmentalism. But another voice has emerged, and the one yelling “Leave Harry and Meghan aloooone, you wankers!” here is longtime family friend Elton John.

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Apple TV Plus Released A Trailer For Its First Original Series “The Morning Show”

/ August 19, 2019

The trailer for The Morning Show, Apple TV Plus’ first series for their new streaming service is here. And it looks like Apple came out of the gate swinging! But like really ineffectively, as if they were met with a swarm of gnats instead of a serious opponent like Netflix or HBO Go. Stars Jennifer Aniston, Reese Witherspoon, and Steve Carell came out pffting and flailing, trying to keep the gnats from sticking to their lip gloss or going up their noses. What I’m saying is that The Morning Show is the gnat in the nose of Apple TV. And with all the streaming options available these days, Apple TV is going to have a hard time getting their hands on people’s money with some weak ass applesauce like this.

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Open Post: Hosted By The Barfing And Shitting Vultures Who Are Ruining A Couple’s Florida Vacation Home

/ August 19, 2019

A New York couple’s dream vacation home is being destroyed by vomiting and shitting vultures who refuse to leave. Basically these vultures are the Michael Lohan of wildlife and it’s costing this couple their second home. I mean, Florida has been generous with its reasons to not build a dream home there but vomiting, butt-spewing vultures are definitely sending a clear message.

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Kate Upton Thinks The Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show Was “A Snoozefest”

/ August 19, 2019

The hearts and boners of horny middle-aged dads and preteen boys broke last month when it was reported that the annual Victoria’s Secret fashion show might not happen this year. Some models were disappointed. Other models, like Karlie Kloss, were perhaps applauding the rumored decision. And then there’s model Kate Upton, who isn’t really that bothered, because the whole spectacle was starting to get pretty boring to her.

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Magnum Apologizes For Comparing Ice Cream-Eating To Going To Prison For Being Gay

/ August 19, 2019

The Huffington Post UK says that Magnum Ice Cream really does not know how to gay bait. They attempted to create, I guess an edgy commercial? An inclusive message of togetherness? Whatever they were going for, Magnum’s marketing department really thought it was a good idea to create an ad where the illegality of homosexuality in a country is compared to the guilty pleasure goodness of… eating a Magnum ice cream…?

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The Rock Married Laura Hashian, His Girlfriend Of 12 Years

/ August 19, 2019

How’s this for tragic: The Rock put a rock on it, and now Lauren Hashian, The Rock’s girlfriend and mother to his 2 pebbles, can go around calling herself Mrs. The Rock, yet she chooses not to. I will never, ever understand people. According to People, Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson revealed on Instagram that he and Lauren got married in Hawaii with minimal hooplah. Pfft! If I were marrying The Rock, not only would I go around yelling at everybody “It’s Mrs. The Rock to you!”, I would have wasted so much of his money on unnecessary hoopla, it would make your head spin.

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