“Yes, I’d like to report that true love has been viciously murdered and is now dead” is what many 911 operators are going to hear from hysterical Gen Z-ers today since Jughead and Betty from Riverdale broke up for real – Just Jared
We’re living in the age of Awkwafina, and it might be the age of Awkwafina for a while, because she’s signed on to a Marvel movie, which means she’ll be in at least 4,939 future Marvel superhero movies – Lainey Gossip
James Cameron congratulating Endgame for de-throning Avatar as the biggest cinematic money-maker of all-time just reminds me that a movie featuring humanoid tail fucking was the #1 movie in the world at one point – Pajiba
Sorry, but Shawn Mendes will not come out to your parents for you. You’ll have to hit up a Z-list reality star on Cameo for that, bitch! – Towleroad
It’s a miracle! One possibly orchestrated by The Patron Saint of Snoochie Boochies (on their break from their shift at Heaven’s Quick Stop). Kevin Smith recently revealed that his relationship with his former brofriend Ben Affleck is no longer bad, like Yoga Hosers, but good, like Clerks or Mallrats.
This news absolutely hurts my heart. Because for many years I watched the Heidi Klum lead series Project Runway to await the quirky challenges new designers would encounter like “high heels made of chicken nuggets” and “plexiglass cocktail bikinis.” Ok, neither one of those designs ever happened, but I was holding out hope. Alas, they may never come to be now. Because it’s being reported that after fifteen years and seventeen seasons, Project Runway may finally be coming to an end.
A major victory was had by Damian Hurley and his half-sister, Kira Kerkorian, in becoming the lawful beneficiaries of their families inheritance. Their paternal grandfather, multi-millionaire Dr. Peter Bing, tried to be a sneaky bitch and argue that because their parents (Damian’s mom is Elizabeth Hurley and his dad is Steve Bing) were not married at the time that the children were not entitled to the trust, a trust that has specific clause for future grandchildren.
Capital FM reports that Shawn Mendes was DMing a fan. No, he wasn’t stepping out on his 100% authentic and truly meaningful relationship with Camila Cabello. Shawn was DMing his fan because she posted a picture of him with a butterfly tattoo edited onto his arm. Well Shawn loved it so much, he wanted to get the picture from her so he could go out and make that dream of hers a reality.
Today’s bleak reminder that time is fleeting and goes way too fast is that it’s Prince George’s sixth birthday. And as usual, Kensington Palace has released a few pictures of Prince George in honor of his birthday. I wish Kensington Palace had also tweeted a note that they didn’t run these pics through some king of age progression app. Because in only 365 days, Prince George appears to have gone from someone who claps merrily at the sight of a choo choo train to a character from Riverdale Junior High.