While Azealia Banks’ career title is “musician,” she’s most well-known for getting into feuds and/or her messy, outspoken commentary about the goings-on of other celebrities. Many would be hard-pressed to name a single one of her songs, but could probably list at least five people she’s shit-talked. Every once in a while, she does grace the populace with a shambles of a performance, but creating chaos truly seems to be her calling. And Even though Lizzo already seemed to respond to Kanye West’s impressively ignorant and uncalled-for comments about her weight during her Toronto concert, Azealia tagged herself in too. On today’s episode of “Azealia’s Drive-By Draggings,” she also took on Ye’s rant about Lizzo’s body.
Some Conservatives Are Pissed About Lizzo Twerking While Playing James Madison’s Crystal Flute From The 1800s
Last week, Librarian of Congress Carla Hayden took to Twitter to invite Lizzo to pop by the Library of Congress while she was in Washington D.C. for her tour. BOOOORRRRRIIIIIN- oh wait, the library has a historical flute collection? Which features a crystal flute owned by President James Madison in 1813? Cool! Especially for a famous flute enthusiast like Lizzo. So, Lizzo took Carla up on her offer, and this past Tuesday, she got to play the prized crystal flute at the library. Later that day, she surprised fans at her concert with a special guest: the flute! Both times Lizzo played the (magic?) crystal flute, she did some very light twerking, because why not? Afterward, everyone was very happy and chill, cuz history is neato, and the crystal flute is pretty. Not! Some people (*cough* conservatives) were très scandalized. And WAP-hater Ben Shapiro, who’s probably never even heard of the crystal flute before this week, was the head of this angry mob.
Someone check on Jillian Michaels! The ever-concerned-about-fat-people trainer must be absolutely seething over Lizzo‘s Emmy win last night for Outstanding Competition Series for her Amazon Prime show, Watch Out for the Big Grrrls, a reality compeition series where 13 women compete to be dancers for her. Jillian’s television, foyer, and windows are all probably broken from a rage blackout where she tore through her home like a bull.
The annual MTV Video Music Awards came on once again and celebrated the accomplishments of many people who can’t sing or have any real talent. But some true artists slip through the cracks and win awards, like everyone’s favorite full0figured flutist Lizzo. For years she has been giving all of her haters every piece of her ass to kiss whenever they try to break down her spirit with their negativity. And recently comedian Aries Spears disrespected Lizzo’s entire catalog of music and talents after saying he can’t get past her appearance. So in response, Lizzo tailored a nice message in her acceptance speech for the Video for Good award that was directly aimed at Aries and anyone else who thinks as he does.
Beyoncé’s “Renaissance” Contains The Same Ableist Slur That Lizzo Recently Had To Remove From Her Single, And Her Team Says It Will Be Changed
Beyoncé finally released her seventh studio album, Renaissance, on Friday. While reviews and sales have been strong (it’s expected to sell at least 275,000 copies in its first week, meaning it will debut at #1), and the Beyhive declared it the best thing since Jesus Christ himself invented sliced bread, the album drop wasn’t seamless. First, it leaked two days early. Then, Kelis got pissed that Beyoncé used a sample of “Milkshake” without her permission. Now, HuffPo reports that Bey’s getting shit for including the ableist slur “sp*z” in the song “Heated”, which was co-written by Drake. In it, Beyoncé sings: “Sp*zzin’ on that ass, sp*z on that ass. Fan me quick, girl, I need my glass.” You may be reading this and thinking: “Damn, didn’t this just happen? Or have I officially lost my mind? Sigh. I guess it’s time to finally book that lobotomy.” No! STOP! It did just happen. With Lizzo and her single, “Grrrls”! Continue reading
Lizzo And Live Nation Pledge $1 Million To Planned Parenthood In Response To The Overturn Of Roe V. Wade
For the small subset of readers who have been in a coma since 1973 and have awkwardly stumbled onto this site while trying to use the new-fangled “internet,” I have bad news for you: Roe v. Wade has been overturned. In a landmark decision, the Supreme Court concluded that the Roe v. Wade outcome was actually a big oopsie and summarily struck down federal protections for abortion access. They then presumably went out for a big meal after a hard day’s work of steadily eliminating constitutional rights. Understandably, millions of Americans are pissed (this is likely an understatement). In response to the issue, some people are taking action. No, not legislators. It’s Lizzo! She announced that she’ll be donating $500,000 to Planned Parenthood and Abortion Rights. It’s better than reading a poem!