You knew it would only be a matter of time before Oprah had words for Donald Trump after he called her “insecure” and “biased” after her 60 Minutes segment last Sunday. I honestly didn’t think she would respond at all so he could follow up with a desperate “Come At Me O!” tweet. But Oprah had a little help from her friend Ellen DeGeneres who came to her aid and gave her the opportunity to respond to the tweet herself during her talk show.
Oprah Winfrey’s speech at the Golden Globes last month made everyone cream their jeans to the point where they chose her like a Pokemon to take on the Charmander of Washington D.C. Donald “How’s My Hair” Trump. And though she’s been toying with us about running, doesn’t it feel weird knowing that if she does indeed run, the battle for the office of POTUS would be between a former talk show host and a former game show host? Can I put on my good church wig and reclaim my time like Aunt Maxine now? Because if that’s our future then the shit-talking began last night during a segment on 60 Minutes.
I’m so used to seeing Oprah Winfrey giving tons of high-energy excitement on the cover of O Magazine, that it’s a little weird to see her working such drabness on the cover of Vanity Fair’s annual Hollywood Issue. I know the theme of ever Hollywood Issue “Stars who forgot to pop an Ambien the night before and only got 2 hours of sleep,” and I’ll applaud Oprah for playing along. But you know there’s a part of her that wanted to drop Reese Witherspoon, rip off that black satin duvet cover to reveal a shimmering jewel-toned gown underneath, throw up her arms and crank a full-tooth smile behind a headline that reads “2018 Is Your Year To SHINE!”
I think we can safely blame Trump for this whole Oprah2020 business. If we weren’t so starved for rational, impassioned and coherent rhetoric, we might have been able to simply appreciate Oprah Winfrey’s very good Cecil B. DeMille acceptance speech for what it was. Instead, people got so caught up with the idea of Oprah>Trump that they lost their damn minds.
Last night’s Golden Globes had it all; drama (thank you Winona Ryder), suspense (wondering if Kirk Douglas would live to the end of each sentence), intrigue (Is Susan Sarandon gonna start some shit?!) and most notably, Oprah bringing the house down. Let me rephrase, Oprah BURNT the house down.
Lord knows there’s a lot of scammers out there and Oprah Winfrey is the biggest of them all. She got us out here wearing Uggs, watching Dr. Phil and reading The Secret. Oprah’s probably scammed more people into buying stupid crap than Bernie Madoff, Charles Ponzi and all the princes of Nigeria combined. But most of Oprah’s scams are on the up and up. If you really want to waste your money on Wisdom of Sundays: Life-Changing Insights from Super Soul Conversations by Oprah Winfrey, you’ve only got yourself to blame.