In a big win for sub-mediocrity, the director who coaxed 2 Razzie award winning performances out of his leads in The Wedding Ringer is having more money thrown at him to write and direct a reboot of Look Who’s Talking. Cue Kirstie Alley getting her agent on the phone in hopes of one last shot at riding John Travolta’s wild hog. Nobody tell her they’re going in a different direction with this one. I want to see how this plays out.
What we absolutely don’t need is yet another remake of a movie from the 80s with a plot that’s nothing more than a sight gag that’s been stretched out on the rack for 147 excruciating minutes. We don’t need it, we don’t want it, and for the love of cinema, please make it stop. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have Jean-Luc Godard on the line, he wants to pitch me on his directorial swan song. Goodbye. No, I’ve really got to go. I SAID GOOD DAY!
What’s that now? Jason Momoa and Peter Dinklage? I’m listening… AS TWINS? In a remake of the 1988 film Twins that starred Arnold Schwarzenegger and Danny DeVito? Jean Luc, I’ve got to run! Something suddenly came up!
Despite the fact that Alan Thicke is dead, fan-favorite Boner is dead, and Kirk Cameron is also dead (to me), Us Weekly is reporting that a reboot of Growing Pains, which ran for 7(!) seasons from 1985-1992, is in the works. Yes, technically Leonardo Di Caprio is still alive, but the chances of him reprising his role as a homeless pre-teen are slim. From the sounds of things, the GP reboot is still in the early stages and so far, only Mike Seaver (Kirk whose real life sister Candace is on Fuller House), sister Carole (Tracey Gold whose real life sister Missy was on Benson), and kid brother Ben (Jeremy Miller, a part-time caterer) have managed to clear their extremely busy schedules. And you can’t have a GP reboot without mom Maggie Seaver! And Judith Light lite actress Joanna Kerns has yet to sign on.
According to Deadline, Punky Brewster is the latest show from your childhood to be dragged out of the attic and wiped down with a damp cloth. Which is great news, because I’m pretty sure we all wanted to know how an emotionally-damaged, abandoned child that lived on the streets of Chicago and was adopted by a random older man turned out, right? That sounds like the kind of dark, depressing sequel that should happen on HBO. But according to Deadline’s description,this Punky sequel actually sounds pretty light.
You’re probably asking yourself, “Didn’t they already make a live-action Snow White?” And I would assume you’re probably thinking of Snow White and the Hunstman, or Mirror Mirror. But to answer your question, neither of those were made by Disney. Despite the fact that there’s obviously already plenty of live-action films about Snow White floating around out there, Variety says Disney is currently making plans for another one.
Jordan Peele better keep one eye over his shoulder less Chris Rock swoop in and claim the title of Most Impressive Second Act As a Horror Film Auteur By a Black Comedian. Sure, Chris is a little older, but that doesn’t mean his brain isn’t overflowing with witty and original ideas that propel the genre forward. According to Variety, Chris is taking a stab at spin-off of the Saw franchise.