Prince Harry And Meghan Markle Made The Cover Of TIME Magazine’s 100 Most Influential People Of 2021 Issue
TIME has released their list of who they believe are the 100 Most Influential People of 2021, which includes Lil Nas X, naturally (you don’t piss off an ocean of conservative folks by lap dancing on the devil for nothing!), as well as Britney Spears, COVID vaccine angel Dolly Parton, Simone Biles, Timbaland and Swizz Beatz, Youn Yuh Jung, Tom Brady, and Bad Bunny. But also, Prince Harry and Meghan Markle, who got a totally-not-Photoshopped-to-a-new-dimension-and-back cover all to themselves. Harry and Meghan’s inclusion on this year’s list falls under the “Icons” section. Oh TIME, why would you do that? You couldn’t put them in the section for artists or leaders or something? Harry and Meghan’s most rabid online haters are going to have a field day with that one. “Icons? More she conned her way into Harry’s life and ruined it forever!!!!1!!”
Spanish chef and philanthropist José Andrés wrote Harry and Meghan’s profile since he teamed up with them last year and they made a donation to his non-profit organization, World Central Kitchen. It was Archewell’s first major charitable donation. So this is what he had to say about them. via TIME Magazine:
“It would be much safer to enjoy their good fortune and stay silent. That’s not what Harry and Meghan do, or who they are. They turn compassion into boots on the ground through their Archewell Foundation. They give voice to the voiceless through media production. Hand in hand with nonprofit partners, they take risks to help communities in need – offering mental-health support to Black women and girls in the U.S., and feeding those affected by natural disasters in India and the Caribbean.
In a world where everyone has an opinion about people they don’t know, the duke and duchess have compassion for the people they don’t know. They don’t just opine. They run toward the struggle.”
Okay yes, they have been known to be charitable types who use their power and influence for good. But run towards struggle? Um, Harry’s family is the picture of struggle: every day the British royals struggle to appear like they’re not a toxic, fucked-up mess. And Harry and Meghan ran as far away from that as possible. José should have kept it a little more simple. Harry and Meghan earned their “icons” status back in March after teasing a juicy tell-all with Oprah Winfrey and actually ended up telling all, plus some. And influential? Just placing their butts in Peter Brady’s patio furniture saw it completely sell out online. Actually, maybe Peter Brady should have written this ode to Harry and Meghan. He owes them! Speaking of elegantly-appointed homes, here’s more of Harry and Meghan looking like they’re auditioning for their own HGTV show called From Crowns to Crown Moulding.
HARRY AND MEGHAN JUST ENDED ME pic.twitter.com/KwlD1AiMia
— michelle (@ddarveyy) September 15, 2021
And speaking of Harry’s toxic family, sources tell Vanity Fair that Harry’s uncle Prince Andrew and his ex-wife Sarah Ferguson the Duchess of York, aka Fergie, are hearing wedding bells again! To be fair, Andrew and Fergie probably both hear wedding bells, because they have a set of fully-charged AirPods in their ears, blasting a never-ending loop of wedding bells, in an attempt to drown out the sound of the FBI yelling, “Andy, we know you’re in there! We can wait all day!“. Andrew and Fergie first got married in 1986 and split in 1996.
While Andrew is still playing hard to get with the FBI, he got around to doing what he should have done weeks ago and responded to Virginia Giuffre’s sexual assault lawsuit. Unsurprisingly, he’s denying it all. via CNN:
Los Angeles attorney Andrew Brettler, who appeared virtually during a pre-trial teleconference in New York on behalf of Andrew on Monday, said the prince’s legal team would challenge the validity of the lawsuit. Brettler referenced a settlement that Andrew’s lawyers said Giuffre had previously entered, precluding her from pursuing litigation against anyone connected to convicted pedophile Jeffrey Epstein.
“We believe, however, that this is a baseless, non-viable and potentially unlawful lawsuit that plaintiff has filed against the Duke. There has been a settlement agreement that the plaintiff has entered into in a prior action that releases the Duke and others from any and all potential liability,” Brettler said.
It’s a good thing Andrew let his Los Angeles lawyer handle this one, because we all know what happens when Andrew is allowed to speak for himself. He’d probably have said some dumb shit like: “She got a settlement check, what else does she need? I mean, uh…I don’t know who she is or anything about her bank accounts. Can we talk about me getting married to Fergie again? I thought that was a good distraction, didn’t you?”
Pic: TIME Magazine