I guess that Kris Jenner didn’t get the ratings she wanted with her Keeping Up My Disappointed In Mankind With The Kardashians–season finale, filled with Khloé Kardashian‘s disastrous love life. Which is like, duh, nobody cares about Khloé. So Kris is making her next move and it’s involving her kurrent favorite, Kylie Jenner. Kylie of course pulled the stunt of all stunts when she announced her surprise baby, but Kris knows you can’t pull the same trick twice.
So now they’re going another direction: talking about a potential baby so they can draw out the pregnancy rumors as long as humanly possible and toss in some marriage rumors too because everyone loves seeing a family come together, right? …And by that I mean, have a sponsored wedding live on E!.
The cereal is the same as the $3 shit–just to get that out of the way. You’re being charged for the box. And apparently it’s a real special one. Travis Scott has teamed up with General Mills and Reese’s Puffs because that’s where we are now as a society. It’s not for any special cause, or to raise awareness or anything like that, it’s just to make some money and gain some publicity. Because all the problems in the world are solved, right? Phewf! For a second I thought humanity was frivolous.
Because we needed further evidence that this is truly the worst possible human timeline or we’re all actually just trapped in a Hell-dimension life-simulator, O.J. Simpson is now on Twitter and he’s putting it to use. O.J. threatened to use Twitter to “get even”, but he’s started with a sort of bland confession.
O.J. decided his first move was going to be “getting even” about the Kris Jenner thing. O.J. denies that they fucked in the hot tub years ago. And you know what else he’s saying ain’t true? Khloé Kardashian is not his kid! Not even O.J. Simpson wants to be associated with the Kardashians.
Blac Chyna Is Mad At Rob Kardashian For Not Letting Their Child Make An Appearance On Her Reality Show
The Kardashian Koven is dead serious about not letting Blac Chyna get any money off the Kardashian name, and that seems to include her own child, Dream Kardashian. Not only does Rob Kardashian not have to pay Blac Chyna anymore money for child support, the Kardashians are making it clear to Chyna that making money off of Dream is off limits too. Dream Kardashian is under the Kardashian banner and so if anybody is going to profit off of her, it’s going to be Pimp Mama Kris.
It is almost the 25th anniversary of the murders of Nicole Brown Simpson and Ron Goldman, and because there is a bit of a cesspool at the bottom end of the human race, there are some desperate people still hoping to cash in on the tragedy. This time the exploitation of the murders of Nicole and Ron comes in the form of O.J. Simpson‘s former manager Norman Pardo, who claims that O.J. and Kris Jenner had a raunchy one night hook-up in a hot tub on a couples vacation. Oh, this is just the intro. There are details, but I advise you to take a deep cleansing breath, jam your finger pads deep into the fur of a sleeping kitten and steel yourself before reading on.
E! put out a teaser trailer for the rest of the season of Keeping Up With The Korrosion Of God’s Light, and of course it’s all about the Khloé Kardashian/Tristan Thompson/Jordyn Woods drama. The trailer should be studied in science classes, because the Koven members somehow defy the laws of science by “crying” even though their tear ducts were filled with fillers years ago.