Open Post: Hosted By Kathy Hilton Reapplying Her Lipstick On Stage During Mariska Hargitay’s People’s Choice Awards Acceptance Speech
Anyone who’d been under the impression that Kathy Hilton’s awkward, dim, and out-of-touch rich lady antics were reserved for her quirky and dysfunctional The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills persona would be incorrect; because Kathy also just brought her awkward, dim, and out-of-touch rich lady antics to the 2022 People’s Choice Awards stage. Last night, Kathy and a few of her RHOBH castmates took the stage as presenters, but when it was time to take a few steps back for Mariska Hargitay to give her acceptance speech for “drama TV star of 2022,” Kathy either forgot where she was or gave no fucks about decorum as she applied lipstick while on stage–also while on camera.
All was right in the world a few days ago when the messy piles of ick nast that our society didn’t ask for but probably deserves–Jesse James and his au courant wife Alaina “Bonnie Rotten” Hicks–had a spat that seeped out onto social media just a few days ago. It started when a pregnant Bonnie accused Jesse of cheating on her in an Instagram post, deleted the accusation, filed for divorce, and then decided to announce on Instagram that she pulled the filing. Jesse posted a public apology for the fight as well which he also ended up deleting, and then both of them bitched on Instagram about the media taking things (that they voluntarily disclosed) and running with them. But, nothing gold can stay; because apparently, Bonnie has now decided that she actually does want the divorce.
Open Post: Hosted By The Dog Who Gets “Hyped” To Leave A Boarding Kennel Because He Might Get McDonald’s
If you’re an emotionally needy dog, you get your own support dog. If you’re a dog who feels compelled to do hood rat stuff, you take your grandma’s car for a joyride and crash that bitch into anything that gets in your way. But if you’re Bucky, you go viral on TikTok by craving the simpler things in life, like a single warm chicken nugget after a long day in boarding. “How adorably quaint!” cried Elton, the diva dog who demands immediate paw cleanings after going outside for an impressively distinguished shit.
Despite the fact that law enforcement and the justice system are known to be stalwart, trustworthy institutions, somehow, the gunman in the February 2021 attack in which Lady Gaga’s dog walker, Ryan Fischer, was brutally beaten and shot, and two of her three French bulldogs were stolen was accidentally released from prison because of a “clerical error” back in April while awaiting trial. Oopsie! But luckily, the gunman, 19-year-old James Howard Jackson, was recaptured a few months later and was just sentenced to 21 years in the slammer for his role in the attack.
Jesse James’ Pregnant Wife Accused Him Of Cheating And Filed For Divorce, But Then Called It Off The Next Day
When famous motorcycle mechanic/well-known peen-passer Jesse “Vanilla Gorilla” James wed former porn star/current Second Amendment humper Bonnie Rotten in a sweaty outdoor June ceremony, harbingers of happiness and hope, such as screaming InfoWars’ gargoyle Alex Jones, everyone should’ve been able to rest assured that true love exists. Bonnie’s now carrying Jesse’s fetus, but caused a stir a few days ago when she posted (and deleted) an Instagram Story calling Jesse out for doing what Jesse’s always done–have fuck times with people who aren’t his wife. Jesse immediately denied the allegations, though he did admit the two had been in a blowout fight in which he called her the “r-word.” And today, Bonnie posted another story asking for peace and sharing that she’d called off the divorce. Now, the two are upset with the media for reporting on the information that they themselves first disbursed to their millions of followers.
If you were out and about this weekend and things didn’t seem as overpopulated as they normally would, it might’ve been because Nick Cannon was indisposed and unable to spontaneously reproduce. In some Papa Nick news that’s shockingly not another “we’re expecting” announcement (although the day is still young), Nick posted on Instagram that he landed in the hospital with pneumonia on Friday but is on the mend.