Hilaria Baldwin Claims She’s Done Having Children, And Says It’s “Ridiculous” To Be Cruel To Another Person

June 21, 2023 / Posted by:

Romper, a digital magazine for “millennial moms”, decided to do a cover story on Hilaria Baldwin. The article is titled “Hilaria Baldwin In Real Life,” Our chica first says to the reporter, “I love being a grandmother.” She is, of course, talking about stepdaughter Ireland Baldwin’s newborn baby, Holland. Will Ireland appreciate the shout-out? Errr, probably not. Anywho, there are lots of interesting (translation: absolutely bonkers) tidbits in this profile, which is pure Baldwinito propaganda. A wealthy white scammer hasn’t received this biased a puff piece since the New York Times profiled Elizabeth “Liz” Holmes.

The Romper journalist says 39-year-old Hilaria is a great mom who doesn’t fakes her pregnancies like her haters say: “fake news, not fake pregnancies.” They also plead with readers to “give the lady a break” cuz Hilaria’s basically been breastfeeding for “10 YEARS straight”. They note she usually has two nannies or babysitter working at any given time, but add this disclaimer:

If you feel the need to judge this, know that in New York, in the Baldwins’ tax bracket, it’s perfectly normal to have two full-time nannies, including weekend help, for families with three children, let alone seven.

At the beginning of the interview, 65-year-old Alec Baldwin is in the apartment, but he leaves partway through to grab a coffee. Hilaria gets annoyed because Alec is still recovering from hip replacement surgery. She tells him to wait an hour so she can accompany him, but he refuses. Her response? A muy española “Aye aye aye!”, followed by, “Call me if you fall over!” The journalist writes that the couple seems to “genuinely like each other,” and Hilaria’s friend, actress Violet Gaynor, confirms this. She says Alec and Hilaria have a “great dynamic,” and there’s “constant laughter”. 

Then, the journalist asks the question on everyone’s lips: why the fuck does Hilaria have so many kids? Turns out, the answer is pretty simple. Hilaria isn’t on birth control, and Alec hasn’t got a vasectomy (oh, and, sometimes, she’s Alec’s mommy too):

“I feel awful when I’m on birth control; it makes me depressed,” she says. And Alec’s not interested in other, er, methods. “Every single time I have a baby, my OB writes down the vasectomy doctor on a Post-it, and I bring it home to Alec,” Hilaria laughs. “He hasn’t done it yet.”

Secondly, she adores the baby phase — she refers to having babies as “creating love” — and from what I can tell, gets deep joy from taking care of others. (That’s why she became a yoga teacher, she says.) This tendency also extends to her husband. “Am I his mommy?” she giggles. “Sometimes I’m his mommy. Sometimes. At the beginning of our relationship, everyone was like, ‘She must have daddy issues because she’s married to somebody older.’ But it’s actually the opposite.”

Hilaria also claims that, while she doesn’t love being pregnant, she loves giving birth:

“This last time around, I pushed her out in a minute! Giving birth is like going down a water slide that’s really scary. And then you get to the bottom, and you’re like, ‘I want to do this again.’”

But she adds that she’s (probably) done having babies:

“This is probably, most definitely, almost completely my last baby,” she says with a smile. “I’m always afraid to say it. I was putting away my maternity clothes recently and was like, ‘I’m afraid to give them away, because then I’ll find out I’m pregnant.’”

Hilaria says she knows she has trolls on social media, but she remains on Instagram cuz “it’s such an amazing mom community.” She talks about her detractors in the Reddit community,  r/HilariaBaldwin, and claims to know many of their real identities:

She hired a private investigator. She hasn’t done anything with that info and doesn’t plan to. But it makes her feel better to know, and when she describes them to me, they’re exactly who you’d think: lonely, lost people.

Hilaria continues:

“It is a ridiculous thing to be cruel to another person,” says Hilaria. She’s right. She’s not hurting anyone. Her kids are happy. People have different ways of living, and she and Alec have chosen their own path.

Isn’t making fun of Hilaria Baldwin getting a little bit old? You would think so, but, in a Netflix special released last week, Amy Schumer roasted Baldwin’s accent, her children’s names, and her husband’s on-set accident, apologizing for “bullying a sociopath.”

My favorite part of the piece is when Hilaria claims her friends call her “the Tiger Woods of babies.” Reminiscent of Dina Lohan’s iconic: “Lindsay’s friends call me ‘The White Oprah’ because they all come to me with their problems.” Except… what exactly does it mean to be the Tiger Woods of babies? That you’re an expert on popping them out? Or you’re a lying cheater whose spouse will eventually smash up your car with a golf club?

Here’s Hilaria’s Instagram post about her Romper profile, pics of her and her child army (sorry, ejército de niños), and a behind-the-scenes video of the interview (and, yes, the accent continues to be all over the fucking place):

Pic: Michael Simon/startraksphoto.com

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