Night Crumbs
Mr. Clean’s modestly sexy British cousins, Fred and Richard Fairbrass of music group Right Said Fred, went off to The Sun to slam “arrogant” Beyonce for interloping their 1991 hit I’m Too Sexy in her song Alien Superstar without asking them first. But this doesn’t seem to be a Kelis situation, and I don’t think Beyonce will end up removing all traces of I’m Too Sexy from her song as she did with Milkshake. Because Beyonce’s team has hit back, saying that the use of the track was approved by its publisher and paid for. They also point out that Right Said Fred tweeted about how nice it was to have a writing credit on a Beyonce album. Well, the good news for Right Said Fred is that it will be impossible for the rage-filled Beyhive to furiously snatch the hairs off of their heads while defending Beyonce because RSF is already fucking bald. Take that, Beyhive! – Just Jared
Even though Keanu Reeves has lived in the U.S. for decades, he’s still a Canadian citizen. But he says he’s definitely open to becoming a U.S. citizen. QUICK! Offer up Scott Baio and Kirk Cameron as a trade to Canada for Keanu Reeves. Although, that might be considered an act of war…. – HuffPo
Ezra Miller Was Back At Work Last Week Shooting Pick-Ups For “The Flash”
While it has been approximately three months since Ezra Miller has been publicly accused of a crime, those of you in the Burbank area who wisely signed up to receive Ezra alerts on your phone for whenever the actor is within a 5-mile radius, already know that Ezra was on the Warner Bros. lot last week. And this time it wasn’t just to blow smoke up the studio’s ass so they would continue to fund Ezra’s true passion project— Ezra Miller: The World’s Most Fascinating Person. According to The Wrap, Ezra was actually there to work! Which really just adds to their overall mystique, don’t you think? Imagine- an artist, activist, and proud member of the proletariat, all wrapped up into one Spandex onesie. Watch out world, there’s nothing Ezra can’t do, including a week of pickups on the $200 million movie they’ve been threatening to tank. No seriously, watch out. Please update your Ezra Alerts app accordingly. And keep all your eyes open; they could be anywhere.
Princess Kate Got Heckled In Northern Ireland
Yesterday Kate Middleton and Prince William visited Northern Ireland to do royal shit (charity, trip to the bar, charity). Sounds fun! Except for the fact that many Irish people loathe the Royals with every fiber of their being. See: the Irish soccer fans who chanted “Lizzie’s in a box!” hours after THE QUEEN died. So it’s not surprising that Kate encountered some Troubles during a walkabout outside Carrickfergus Castle. People reports that while Kate was greeting people in the crowd, one woman took her hand and said, “Nice to meet you, but it would be better if it were when you were in your own country.” HA! All Kate could do was awkwardly laugh, cuz when ya burnt, ya burnt.
Open Post: Hosted By Lindsay Lohan Falling On Her Sword To Save Christmas In The Trailer For Netflix’s “Falling For Christmas”
We may be careening towards complete societal collapse, but even if it’s our last, this Christmas is sure to be the best one yet thanks to Lindsay Lohan falling off a cliff in the trailer for her Netflix Christmas movie, Falling for Christmas. Last year we learned that The War on Christmas’ clumsiest warrior had pulled herself away from the recording studio, where she is still presumably putting the finishing touches on her long-awaited album that was supposed to usher in the 2019 Lohaniassance, to film FFC as well as a second rom-com for Netflix called Irish Wish, which will presumably come out just in time to save Saint Patrick’s day.
Cheryl Burke Says That She’ll Fight Her Ex, Matthew Lawrence, In Court For Custody Of Their Dog
Because the court docket in a state where excessive water usage violations and Erika Jayne Girardi exist isn’t full enough, Dancing With The Stars pro, Cheryl Burke just waltzed in to make it known that she’s ready to go to war with her recent ex-husband, Matthew Lawrence, when it comes to the custody of the couple’s particularly human-named French Bulldog, Ysabella.
Kanye West Discussed Kim Kardashian, Lizzo, And His “White Lives Matter” Moment In An Interview With Tucker Carlson
I’m not sure if there’s a “shenanigans quota” Kanye West needs to meet by the end of the year but if so he’s rapidly making his way to his goal. I was under the impression he was finally ready to take a much-needed long-ass vacation away from the spotlight, but that idea hit his brain with a “Does Not Compute” message because here we go again. After pulling his White Lives Matter stunt during his Paris fashion show, Kanye is ready to drive more nails into the coffin which holds his career (and his respect) during an interview with Fox News’ Tucker Carlson. Not only did he DEFEND his White Lives Matter message, but he also spoke about his ex Kim Kardashian and Lizzo. And he spoke with all the charm and grace of a future cult leader.