You know when Tim Gunn used to warn Project Runway contestants about making sure their looks don’t go too costumey? It always turned out to be pretty solid advice, and contestants who didn’t heed his warnings were usually sent home. I always imagined those losing designers slipped quietly away to careers in the circus or on the drag circuit. But judging from the runway at last night’s Billboard Music Awards in Las Vegas, some of them went on to have lucrative careers making costumes for remakes of popular movies.
It’s been over 10 years since The Hurt Locker won the Academy Award for Best Picture. That means it’s ripe for a remake. In this version, Mustard has the nerve wracking job of diffusing Mariah Carey’s Lush bath bombs. It’s a dangerous job, but Mustard’s just the man to do it. Look, he’s on the hair brush right now, getting dispatched to his next mission. They’ve found a Bom Perignon in Mimi’s toilet!
It seems like with some pregnant celebrities after they give birth, you think, “Huh? Didn’t they just get knocked up?” Eva Longoria is not that type of pregnant celebrity. Every time I saw a picture of her, she looked like she was about to hit up Home Depot to see what kind of steel supports it would take to stabilize her lower back. She doesn’t have to worry about that anymore, because at long last, 43-year-old Eva has given birth.
According to People, Eva’s 6-pound baby son was born yesterday at Cedars-Sinai Hospital in Los Angeles. This is the first baby for Eva, and the fourth child for her husband of two years, 50-year-old José “Pepe” Bastón (he has three children from a previous marriage). They confirmed the news by releasing the first picture of their new baby Santiago Enrique Bastón to HOLA! USA. On the same day she gave birth? Don’t ever doubt the work ethic of Eva’s publicist.
WORLD EXCLUSIVE! Say hola to #EvaLongoria’s son Santiago Enrique Bastón! ? ¡Eva Longoria ya es mamá! ?? En exclusiva mundial para #HOLAUSA Eva comparte la primera foto de su bebé. Todos los detalles en nuestra web. Link en bio y stories. #itsaboy #congrats #babynews #socute #PepeBastón Foto: @usahola
Santiago was born just five days after Eva said goodbye to her 15-year-old first baby, her dog Jinxy. I never thought Eva would honor the memory of her doggy by naming her new son Jinxy, if only because I’m pretty sure a name like that pigeonholes you into a life of clip-in hair sales. And Eva already has the biggest clip-in hair expert in her life.
Here’s some more of Eva just three days before she gave birth.
Back in the spring of 2005, all of the Desperate Housewives did a Vanity Fair cover shoot and it turned into the cover shoot from hell. The story goes that there was tension between them all, and Teri Hatcher was pissed about not getting first pick at the outfits and not being in the middle of the photos. Fast forward thirteen years, Eva Longoria appears to still have beef – baby be damned! Continue reading
An E! Producer Claims She Was Fired For Airing Eva Longoria’s “You Guys Screwed Catt Sadler” Interview
Fired E! producer Aileen Gram-Moreno filed a complaint against her former employers with the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission on Friday, according to The New York Times (via Variety). She’s claiming her dismissal was because she allowed Eva Longoria to slam E! live on air at the Golden Globes in January. Eva made it clear she’s in the corner of Catt Sadler, who left E! when she reportedly discovered her male co-host Jason Kennedy made a grip more than her. E! says that Aileen was axed because she sucked at her job. Who to believe? Keep in mind one of the parties involved inflicted the Kardashians on us. Continue reading
Angelina Jolie Decided To Fulfill Someone’s Feathered 60s Fantasy Last Night (And Other Looks From The Golden Globes)
Almost everyone who walked the Golden Globes red carpet this year wore black to protest Hollywood’s sexual misconduct problem. One thing that wasn’t being protested was good taste. There were a lot of black velvet outfits on that red carpet. Sure, it’s a bit of an obvious choice, but a choice I was absolutely here for, because anything that makes my brain start blasting “Black Velvet” by Alannah Myles gets two thumbs up from me.
But some people went a little more experimental with their all-black interpretation. Like Angelina Jolie, who showed up to the Golden Globes in some goth Lawrence Welk Show realness by Atelier Versace. It’s a little Barbra Streisand at the 1969 Oscars, with a splash of 60s televangelist, all poured onto a fainting couch and garnished with, “But detective, I swear my husband was dead when I found him!”
The gender-reversed Overboard remake that nobody asked for now has a trailer. And after the cut is how I imagine the conversation at the studio went down when discussing this cinematic bowel movement.