Coco Once Again Defended Breastfeeding Her 5-Year-Old Daughter

A couple of years ago Coco announced to the world that she was still breastfeeding her and Ice-T’s daughter, Chanel, who was almost 4 at the time. Cut to 2021, and Coco has given us a much-needed parenting update: she’s still sharing her magnificent milkers with her kid, who will turn 6 in November. Judge all you want, but feeding from titty balls as gargantuan as Coco’s is how superheroes are born. Someday Chanel might just save us all!

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Coco’s Almost 4-Year-Old Daughter Is Still Breastfeeding

If a normal set of tits are a baby buffet for breastfeeding infants, then Coco’s coconuts are the thinly attended but ridiculously overstocked Thanksgiving buffet at the Bellagio in Las Vegas. And Coco and Ice-T’s baby Chanel has the place all to herself. Chanel, who turns 4 in November, is still breastfeeding, though mostly for comfort these days, according to a post Coco shared on Instagram. I don’t have kids, and I don’t presume to know if it’s normal for a 4-year-old to breastfeed, but if it’s weird, don’t blame Coco, blame Coco’s boobs. Those things have a mind of their own!

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The Red Carpet Of The MTV VMAs Was A Journey Through Space And Time

The year is 2019, and there’s a teddy bear in Naughty by Nature. It’s as confusing a notion as it is a sentence to read. But these are the times we are living in. Time to accept that what once was in the past, will be revisiting us in the present (with a collection of random pop culture barnacles from The Time Tube attached), to confuse future generations. So now NBN (pictured above with their new bear Illtown Sluggaz and Redman) has a Kanye West style College Dropout teddy bear in it, and Treach has gone from excoriating his ex-wife Pepa (of Salt-N-Pepa fame) on Instagram, to parading around in bondage gear and issuing confusing handkerchief codes at the 2019 MTV Video Music Awards. Hip hop hooray?

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Lady Gaga Attempted A Lace-Up Braid, And Other Looks From The Grammys

But of course this could only be Lady Gaga. While others might think, “You know, maybe this year I’ll walk up the red carpet in a piece that makes it looks like I’m trying to cover up all the hair I lost after leaving my at-home highlighting kit on for too long,” Lady Gaga goes out and does it. She tells her stylist to make her look like a 73-year-old balding hippie who refuses to face the music about their hair situation, and she wears it with pride! As for her outfit, well that’s another story all together.

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Open Post: Hosted By Coco Oiling Up The Sexy On Miami Beach

It’s been way too long since I’ve temporarily pulled Dlisted out of the gutter and carried it to upper echelons of elegance by posting about Coco. The once-reigning Queen of Camel Toes has been really busy doing regular mom things like dressing up herself and her 1-year-old daughter Chanel in matching outfits for Instagram photo shoots. But thankfully, Coco has taken a much-needed break from that exhausting mom shit to sun her oiled-up magnificent silicone melons on Miami Beach today. I didn’t know that people still used brown bottle Hawaiian Tropic, but leave it to Coco to stick to a classic. Although, if she was a true traditionalist who doesn’t give a hell about skin cancer, she would’ve slathered her goddess body with Baby Oil, Crisco, Vaseline and that cooking grease my abuelita kept in an old Prego jar under the kitchen sink.

On a different note, seeing Coco’s body in that red, white and blue two piece gave me an idea. Earlier today I read something about how the Wonder Woman movie may be as much of a CGI’d turd as Batman v. Superman: Dawn of Justice was. Well, if that’s true and DC wants to save it before it comes out this summer, there’s an easy fix. All they have to do is summon the cast and crew of WW to Miami Beach and shoot new scenes with Wonder Woman’s new sidekick: SHE-HULK! If they put Coco as She-Hulk in the WW movie, the only thing DC executives would have to worry about is finding a shelf strong enough to hold all their awards and accolades!

Here’s more of Coco giving the people of Miami Beach a giant serving of oily gorgeousness while enjoying the sun with  Chanel.

Pics: Splash

Open Post: Hosted By Coco As A Slutty Footlocker Employee

Don’t worry about that dude behind Coco. Coco’s minions always carry around a fainting couch because everywhere she goes, men, women, children, animals and a few inanimate objects pass out from being exposed to that much elegance, perfection and grace. So as soon as that guy began the fainting process by closing his eyes, I’m sure one of her assistants rolled a couch behind him.

Coco, whose legendary camel toe decided to pull back a little last night, sashayed into Heidi Klum’s Halloween party in NYC with her glorious titty balls trying to use all their strength to HULK SMASH through those strings. Those strings must’ve been made with Teflon, kryptonite and a blessing from God because they are holding on. Chichis looking like two big-headed toddlers trying to headbutt their way out of a playpen.

Most would say that Coco wore a slutty referee costume from Yandy, but I say that Coco wore a slutty Footlocker employee costume from Yandy. Although, Ice -T went as a prison inmate, so there’s a chance that they could’ve coordinated their costumes and Coco actually dressed up as some kind of slutty prison house aerobics instructor. Whatever the case may be, Coco still filled that party up to the top with her beauty.

Here’s more of the tricks who showed up to Heidi Klum’s Halloween party, and yes, 99% of them wore a better costume than Heidi did. Bethenny Frankel, as a Dollar General Catwoman with rabies, is the 1%.

Pics: Splash