Category: Lana Del Rey

Open Post: Hosted By Lana Del Rey Showing Up Late To Her Glastonbury Set Because Her “Hair Takes So Long”

June 26, 2023 / Posted by:

Lana Del Rey had to follow invigorating acts like Guns N’ Roses, Lizzo, and that wispy English baritone treasure, Rick Astley, at the Glastonbury Festival on June 24. And since Lana, the “Greatest Songwriter of the 21st Century” (hork!), makes music that’s essentially auditory Ambien, the fact that she was scheduled to begin her headlining set at 10:30 p.m. made total sense. But Lana showed up annoyingly late, apologized to the crowd for her hair taking longer than anticipated, and acknowledged that her set might get cut short. And she was correct; because her mic got cut off mid-song at her scheduled end time.

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Taylor Swift Is Getting Called Out For Her “Calculated” Collaboration With Ice Spice

May 25, 2023 / Posted by:

Subtle” was redefined yesterday when Taylor Swift burped up the news that she’s releasing new versions of two songs from her album Midnights. TayTay announced that she and Lana Del Rey recorded a new version of their song Snow on the Beach and that she and IT rapper of the moment, Ice Spice, did a remix of her song Karma. Many have stamped the latter collab with the words “DAMAGE CONTROL” since TayTay’s current poo (typo and it stays), Matty Healy, laughed at racist comments about Ice Spice on a podcast. And while some Swifties have once again defended their savior over this, others are adding this damage control jewel to TayTay’s Queen of Performative Acts crown.

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Lana Del Rey Is Reportedly Engaged

March 30, 2023 / Posted by:

Did you know that there’s a tunnel under Ocean Blvd? And, more importantly, did you know that sources tell Billboard Lana Del Rey is engaged? Well? Didja? I didn’t! But good for her. Last we heard, Lana was dating musician Jack Donoghue, and fans speculated that the flowers she received on Valentine’s Day were from him. But, apparently, Lana’s fiancé is a whole new guy: it’s Evan Winiker, a managing partner at the talent agency, Range Media. Phew! He’s not a cop!

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Rolling Stone UK Calls Lana Del Rey The Greatest Songwriter Of The 21st Century

March 10, 2023 / Posted by:

There are still almost 77 years left until the 22nd century, but that didn’t stop Rolling Stone UK from declaring that 37-year-old Lana Del Rey is the greatest songwriter of the 21st century during an interview with her (a big win for the Tumblr girls of 2012). Lana should celebrate by putting her new title from RS UK on a billboard in her ex’s hometown.

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Open Post: Hosted By Lana Del Rey Promoting Her New Album With One Billboard In Her Ex’s Hometown

December 22, 2022 / Posted by:

Lana Del Rey, an ancient Greek siren accidentally transported to modern times, has a new album out in March. It’s called, Did You Know That There’s a Tunnel Under Ocean Blvd., which is also the name of the album’s lead single. What’s her next song, “You Know That There’s An Abandoned Subway Station Under Toronto’s Bay Station, Right?” Anywho, TooFab reports that Lana recently took to Instagram to reveal that she put up one billboard to promote her album. Just one. Its location? Tulsa, Oklahoma, which just so happens to be where her ex Sean Larkin lives. Petty, thy name is Del Rey.

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Lana Del Rey’s Car Was Broken Into And Thieves Stole Her Laptop With Her Newest Album And 200-Page Book On It

October 20, 2022 / Posted by:

Banshee Yodel Witch Queen of Sleepy Pop, Yawna–I mean–Lana Del Rey, is here with a message. And it’s not about casting a spell. Lana posted videos on Instagram, explaining how she left her backpack in her car for just a moment, and someone broke her car’s windows and stole her laptop, drives, camcorders, and more. And this is why I carry my shit with me everywhere, everytime–Paranoia saves lives! The laptop included her full 200-page book of poetry and her newest yet-to-be-released album of yodel music. That thief probably put the album on, fell asleep for a full eight hours, woke up from their REM sleep, and realized they stole the motherlode!

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