HuffPo says that Helen Mirren has heard you comparing her looks to Keanu Reeve‘s girlfriend and you know what? She’s not mad at it. Yeah, Helen, why the hell would you be? It’s Keanu “Immortal Gentleman” Reeves!
Deadline says that all of us Helen Mirren stans can get hyped because the Dame herself is going to be back for more Fast & The Furious madness. And she will be joined by previous villainess of the franchise, Charlize Theron who has been announced to also be coming back for the ninth installment. These two Oscar winners coming back? Dave Bautista will have to come around now!
For the Jolie-Pitts, nothing puts the “f”s in “family fun” quite like “forced foto-ops” on the red carpet for a kids movie with mom. Angelina Jolie unplugged the X-Box mid-Fortnite Battle Royale and told all them kids to go put on their outside clothes for the Hollywood premiere of Tim Burton’s Dumbo. Here’s the twist: They had fun.
Well, well, well – here’s one big award Lady Gaga won’t be taking home this year (besides the Oscar). The Razzie nominations are here, and there’s nary a nod to A Star Is Born, Green Book, or Bohemian Rhapsody, all movies more worthy of scorn (according TO ME) than any of the 5 that a got a Worst Movie nomination. And the acting category is a real mind-bender with Donald and Melania Trump each being nominated for playing themselves in Michael Moore’s Fahrenheit 11/9. Trump was even nominated a second time in Dinesh D’Souza’s Death of A Nation, also for playing himself. I mean, sure. But what are we really doing here?
For the first time in what felt like the Oscars 90-year history, the ceremony didn’t drag on over four hours. Last night they managed to keep it at 3 hours and 50 minutes (although, the ratings may have hit an all-time low). It may have come under four hours, because at the top of the show, Jimmy Kimmel announced that whatever winner gave the shortest acceptance speech would go home a Jet Ski!
Jimmy presented it convention center boat show-style with Helen Mirren showing it off. Helen should have gone home with her own special prize for suffering through all those inevitable “Hey mama, do you come with the Jet Ski?” jokes. Jimmy later doubled-down by adding in a trip to Lake Havasu, Arizona.
Actors and directors have a tendency to like attention and validation, and none of the winners last night had the self-control needed not to ramble on during their acceptance speech (Gary Oldman admitted as much). So it’s not really a surprise that the winner of the shortest acceptance speech went to a non-actor. Phantom Thread costume designer Mark Bridges had the shortest speech of the night, clocking in at 36 seconds.
Entertainment Weekly says there were official rules posted on monitors inside the Dolby Theater for the Kawasaki Jet Ski Ultra 310LX, valued at approximately $18,000. Mark rode out at the end of the ceremony on his lime green Jet Ski with Helen Mirren on the back. I doubt Mark even got the Jet Ski home. Oscar presenter and GTE (good times enthusiast) Matthew McConaughey was probably looking at that Jet Ski with saucer eyes, and cornered Mark backstage with an offer to take it off his hands.
Someone text Brie Larson and let her know she can make her hands slap together for every award winner this year. Jennifer Lawrence and Jodie Foster will be presenting the Best Actress statuette together this evening, according to Variety. Normally last year’s Best Actor winner handles that task. But last year’s Best Actor was alleged creep in a beard Casey Affleck and it’s #TimesUp for the handsy types. No one wants torches and pitchforks to take the stage at the Dolby Theatre. That should only happen if Meryl Streep wins because it IS possible for one woman to have too many accolades. Continue reading