Last week, I posted about the trailer for Wes Anderson’s Asteroid City, a vision of pastel overload starring every working actor in Hollywood. And this week, I’m posting about Greta Gerwig’s Barbie movie, a vision of pastel overload starring every working actor in Hollywood. But unlike Asteroid City, the Barbie movie is low on twee pretentiousness and high on Ryan Gosling’s nipples brushing up against a hot Magic Earring Ken jean vest (note to Wes Anderson: if you want to make Asteroid City more watchable, include a shot of Ryan Gosling’s nipples brushing up against a hot Magic Earring Ken jean vest in the final cut). In December, we got one Barbie teaser trailer, and today, they released teaser #2. I guess they just keep sticking the tip in. Well, as much as a flat-crotch’d plastic doll can stick the tip in.
And on top of the second teaser trailer, we got tons upon tons of character posters, including Michael Cera as Ken’s ginger friend Allan. FINALLY, Allan is getting his time in the shine, but did they really have to make him look like a sleazy frat boy turned sleazy investment banker?! Allan might be a Murdough.
Back in September, Dua Lipa and Trevor Noah were spotted hugging and kissing on the street after an intimate dinner in the West Village. Since then? Nada. And now, over two months later, Page Six is reporting that Dua and Jack Harlow are a thing! This pairing may seem random, but, actually, it makes perfect sense. Jack’s latest album, Come Home, The Kids Miss You (Pitchfork called it “among the most insipid, vacuous statements in recent pop history”), features a song called “Dua Lipa”. It’s about how he wants to date Dua. Does Dua want to date Jack? Doesn’t matter. It’s like a public marriage proposal. You sorta have to say “um, suuure” to appease the masses.
It’s a big Trevor Noah week for the world. On Wednesday night, he and pop star Dua Lipa were spotted on a possible date in New York City. The Daily Mail reports that the two were seen “enjoying an intimate dinner together” at a Jamaican restaurant in the East Village. Later, the maybe-couple were papped ending their night with a big ol’ sidewalk smooch. One kiss is all it takes… to quit your day job and become a full-time Mr. Dua Lipa. Yep, last night 38-year-old Trevor made the surprise announcement that he was leaving The Daily Show with Trevor Noah after hosting for 7 years.
If Robin Thicke’s working relationship with Pharrell back in 2013 has taught anyone in the music industry anything, it’s that you should probably spend just as much time on your beat, melody, and lyrics as you do on making sure as hell that you’re not blatantly ripping off someone else’s song. That’s what happened to them with “Blurred Lines,” and it ended with a huge lawsuit and a $5 million judgment awarded to the plaintiffs. The same thing is currently happening to Dua Lipa, except her situation is a little different. Instead of one lawsuit accusing her of copying a previously established song, there are two lawsuits accusing her of such. So yeah, her lawyers have been busy this month.
If there’s ever been a time to throw DaBaby out with DaBathwater it’s now. Earlier this week, the lil’est rapper of them all decided to make homophobia part of his official brand after he was criticized for his comments about HIV/AIDS and asked audience members who “ain’t sucking dick in the parking lot” to raise their lighters high during his performance at the Rolling Rock festival in Miami. After spending the last couple of days stirring the pot and doubling down on the ignorance and hate, Sir Elton John was finally made aware of his existence and responded on Twitter. Elton posted a 5-part thread condemning “the HIV misinformation and homophobic statements made at a recent DaBaby show.” Sadly, it was a pretty tame retort considering that Sir Elton is in possession of the greatest collection of reading glasses the world has ever seen!
Pop star Dua Lipa hasn’t been around that long, but she’s been dragged for having the dance skills of a sedated giraffe with two left hooves. Well, all of that hate over her dancing was fuel for Dua Lipa to get better at busting out moves. I have to say Dua is now two steps above Hilary Duff. And that’s a big improvement! Dua used to be like one step above Mariah Carey.