Night Crumbs
No, the above screenshot is not from a Michael Vick biopic where the dogs fight back. But it is from an R-rated dog revenge movie called Strays, which is about an adorable, sweet pooch (voiced by Will Ferrell) who becomes a stray after his piece of trash owner (played by Will Forte) abandons his ass on purpose. The dog then meets other strays, and they help him get dick-destroying revenge on his shit owner. FINALLY, some real art. I mean, a stupid animal movie where dogs with CGI’d talking mouths get revenge on a cold-hearted asshole? I am this movie’s audience. Well, I am this movie’s audience after a few tokes, anyway – Pajiba
Filming on Cameron Diaz’s comeback movie has started, and in nearly every pap shot from the set, it looks like she’s still having triggering flashbacks from the last time she was in front of the cameras with Jamie Foxx (that Annie mess) – Lainey Gossip
Prince Harry And Meghan Markle Will Sit For Depositions In Samantha Markle’s Defamation Case Against Her Half-Sister
I would ask somebody to please go check on Piers Fucking Morgan right now, but even I’m not that cruel. Nobody should be subjected to the sight of Piers prancing around in his tighty-whities doing celebratory jetés at the news that Prince Harry and Meghan Markle may actually have to sit for depositions in response to Megan’s half-sister Samantha Markle‘s defamation suit against her, except for Samantha herself. Not even Jeremy Clarkson, but that’s only because the freak would probably nut all over himself, and he doesn’t deserve the pleasure.
Madonna Responded To All The Comments About Her Looks At The Grammys, And Blames Ageism And Long Lens Cameras
On Sunday, Madonna attended the Grammys to introduce Kim Petras and Sam Smith’s satanic performance of “Unholy.”. Now, because it’s 2023 and Madonna’s visage has undergone some, err, changes, she’s since faced a lot of negative attention about her appearance that night. The general question seems to be, “what the fuck did Madge do to her face?” Two days later, Madonna is clapping back, and blaming the criticism on ageism, misogyny, and those dastardly long-lens cameras. Somewhere, Madonna’s plastic surgeon just breathed a giant sigh of relief. Once again, he’s managed to slither away scot-free. Continue reading
Open Post: Hosted By The Little Teaser For Ben Affleck’s Super Bowl Commercial For Dunkin’ (Featuring JLo)
I’m starting to think the real reason Ben Affleck looked so over it during the Grammys wasn’t that Jennifer Lopez made him stay up past his bedtime. About a month ago, it appeared Ben had taken a new part-time gig at Dunkin’ because his full-time job of being JLo’s husband doesn’t pay enough. But he’s actually doing double Dunkin’ duty for the dough. So during the Grammys Ben probably had lukewarm coffee and sugary stale donuts on his mind while counting the millions of dollars he’ll be making when his Super Bowl ad drops this Sunday. And, of course, JLo is in on it as well.
Ashley Benson And Brandon Davis Have Been A Thing For A Few Months
E! Online reports that Ashley Benson and Brandon Davis are dating, and a source claims they’re “really into each other.” Brandon Davis… Brandon Davis… why does that name ring a bell? WAIT. Brandon “Greasy Bear” Davis? Paris Hilton’s scumbag sidekick from the mid-2000s? Brother to Jason Davis (RIP)? The billionaire oil heir who proudly informed the paps that Lindsay Lohan was a firecrotch who came freckles?! Ashley Benson’s friends, assemble! Your girl is in dire straits.
Alec Baldwin Has Filed To Have The Special Prosecutor In Charge Of The “Rust” Case Against Him Dismissed
Things seem to have quieted down over at Case de Baldwin. Hilaria Baldwin has apparently turned over her Instagram duties to her and Alec Baldwin’s eldest daughter Carmen while she and Alec focus on the serious legal peril at hand. As we know, Alec is charged with two counts of involuntary manslaughter (as is armorer Hannah Gutierrez-Reed), with each count carrying a sentence of up to 18 months in jail and a $5,000 fine for the accidental shooting death of Halyna Hutchins on the set of Rust. One of those charges includes a “firearm enhancement” and carries a mandatory five-year sentence in state prison if he’s found guilty. So now is certainly not the time for fun and games. However, if you are one of the million followers, Hilaira got for her birthday, do not fret. You’re in good hands. Carmen’s punctuation is preternaturally flawless for a 9-year-old.