TMZ reports that A$AP Rocky made it back to the States yesterday and has vowed to never, ever enter the country of Sweden again after spending a month in a Stockholm jail on an assault charge. The judge in the case allowed Rocky and two members of his entourage to skip town prior to their trial verdict being rendered on August 14. Our star-fucking Troll-In-Chief has, of course, already taken credit for getting A$AP released at the behest of Kanye West and Kim Kardashian. It’s nice to see that everyone’s priorities are on point. Tasks like getting some asshole-sounding rapper out of jail in a foreign country should definitely be an imperative seeing as everything else back here in the U.S. is going so swimmingly.
TMZ says that shit has finally come to fruition for A$AP Rocky and his Swedish dilemma. A$AP has been in Swedish custody for quite some time now, spending a lot of time in their much-better-conditions-than-America jail. Now, more than twenty days after his initial arrest, he’s been officially charged with assault. So are you telling me that Kim Kardashian didn’t successfully get him out of jail?!! If Kim Kardashian can’t save a black person from jail, who can?!
Ariana Grande Has Something To Say After One Of Her Favorite Photographers Is Accused Of Being A Massive Creep
According to ELLE magazine, the Instagram set allegedly has their own version of Terry Richardson, and it’s Marcus Hyde. Marcus is a photographer who is a favorite of Ariana Grande and Kim Kardashian, but he was recently exposed online by fashion industry whistle blowers Diet Prada as being an alleged camera-wielding ball of yuck. It’s a mess that Ariana clearly doesn’t want her name attached to, and it looks like she’s doing what she can to sever any ties to Marcus.
After A$AP Rocky was arrested in Sweden and kept in jail for the past few weeks, people have been trying to get him out, and not just his lawyers. Kim Kardashian, Kanye West and Donald Trump also have been publicly trying to get him out of jail. Well, it looks like the results of those efforts are in: and it’s not looking good for Rocky. It’s now being reported that the guy who started the fight with Rocky and his security team while they were minding their own business, will not be charged. And neither will Rocky’s security guard. But you know who probably will be charged and is still in jail?
Kim Kardashian is really taking her new job as savior of black people seriously, guys. Not only did she free Alice Johnson but she’s also been working really hard on prison reform which results (if she was even responsible for any of them) have been overwhelmingly meh and she’s becoming a lawyer too!
Kim’s latest missing is saving A$AP Rocky from Swedish jail by getting the White House to intervene! But it’s weird because the Swedish prosecutors–the ones in charge of that decision–are like, “Hmm, this is news to me.”
Kendall Jenner’s one time special friend, A$AP Rocky, is still wasting away in a Swedish jail two weeks after getting arrested for aggravated assault. We should have known it wouldn’t be too long before The Moses of Calabasas, Kim Kardashian, would use her connections to The White House to intervene on his behalf. According to TMZ, Kanye West urged Kim to contact her good friend Jared Kushner who in turn alerted the President Of The United States about Rocky’s situation. Upon learning of Rocky’s plight (and probably after checking to see if he’d ever publicly criticized him), Donald Trump reportedly acknowledged that “something seemed amiss”. Considering Rocky’s own lawyer disputed that he was being held in inhumane conditions, some might say all of this is overkill. But Rocky is reportedly being held without a television! UPDATE: He probably does have a TV.