Category: Michelle Yeoh
Here’s The First Full Trailer For “Avatar: The Way Of Water”
A lot has changed in the 13 years since Avatar debuted in theaters and we all learned the true meaning of CINEMA. A week prior to that historic occasion, we thought Alvin and The Chipmunks: The Squeakquel was the apex of man’s achievements in motion pictures. How wrong we were. It’s almost embarrassing how simple and easily entertained we were. Those little neutered chipmunk nubbins, mere gestures towards anatomic verisimilitude, were laughably rudimentary compared to the virile, lashing appendages of the Na’vi and we, as a culture, have been horny for tails ever since. And now, after more than a decade of looking at our pets in a way that makes us a little bit uncomfortable, the first full trailer for Avatar: The Way of Water is here to remind us of that indescribable feeling we get when the lights begin to dim, and we masturbate to something we’ve never masturbated to before. Somehow, nut ache feels good in a place like this.
13 Years Later, Here’s The Teaser Trailer For “Avatar: The Way Of Water”
What if I told you there was a sequel to Barb and Star Go to Vista Del Mar on the way? I think you’d be pretty stoked, I know I would be. But what if I then told you it was directed by James Cameron and that Jamie Dornan is not in it, as far as we can tell? Perhaps your enthusiasm might begin to wane, as mine did while realizing that I was actually watching a teaser trailer for Avatar: The Way of Water, and not Barb and Star 2: Barb and Star Raid Davy Jones Locker. Variety reports that after 13 years, we finally get a glimpse of what James has been doing all this time, and apparently, he’s been trying to clear the licenses for Lisa Frank’s aquatic series of stickers to complete his vision.
Jamie Lee Curtis Lets “It Out” In Her New Movie Because She Wanted Her Character To Look As Real As Possible
Jamie Lee Curtis really gives us a range of looks. She can serve Uber Sexy MILF Realness, and also REAL Realness. In her new movie, Everything Everywhere All At Once, she plays an IRS inspector and Jamie says that she wanted to look as “real” as possible. So she pushed the Spanx away and let herself breathe. Today, Jamie is getting headlines for her normal stomach, but when are we going to talk about the three anal plug awards behind her? Is that an award an IRS auditor gets after really giving it to a tax cheater? We need answers.
The Royals Attended The London Premiere of James Bond In “No Time To Die”
You know the British Royal Family is pressed for some good PR because they have risked the very fabric of the monarchy by sending 4 of their highest ranking members to a movie premiere. And the movie is fucking cursed! I guess they’re running low on Egyptian antiquities to pilfer and instead decided to tempt the gods by sending Princes Charles and William, and Duchesses Camilla and Kate to go rub elbows with the Hollywood hoi polloi at the London premiere of No Time To Die, the James Bond movie that was supposed to have come out in 2019 and make Ana de Armas a star. And here we are, 2 years and 200 pap strolls later, and neither of those things has happened!
Open Post: Hosted By Lady Gaga Holding A Dead Turkey
You may have read that headline and looked at that picture and thought, “I don’t see her holding a copy of Artpop.”
The National Board of Review ceremony happened in NYC last night, and the winners were announced in November, so Lady Gaga already knew she won Best Actress. She didn’t have to worry about straining her Botoxed face muscles while trying to look happy as either Glenn Close or Olivia Colman took the win. A Star Is Born also won one National Board of Review awards for Bradley Cooper (Best Director), and one for Sam Elliott (Best Supporting Actor). Regina King was also there last night to accept the Best Supporting Actress award, and the cast of Crazy Rich Asians showed up to collect their trophy for Best Ensemble.