Category: CPS Is On Line One

Kylie Jenner Announces The New Name Of Her Baby Formerly Known As Wolf

January 23, 2023 / Posted by:

Kylie Jenner and her on-and-off-again piece/father of her two kids, Travis Scott, are off again, so he’s probably covered in tons of pussy today (“And that’s different from when he was with her how…?” asked you, making a point). So at the Schiaparelli Lukewarm Mess Haute Couture Spring/Summer 2023 in Paris today, Kylie showed that two tricks can play at the game by partly covering herself with a giant pussy. The other stuffed animals at the Disney store are definitely pouring one out for the poor plushie Mufasa who died just so he could be an accessory on a Kartrashian-DeJENNERate! But before Kylie Jenner delivered an all-cat look at the Schiaparelli show (see: that lion head, her kat klaw nails, and her serving “gassy Garfield trying to keep it sexy” in the face), she announced the replacement name for the baby boy she birthed out a year ago. Kylie and Travis have re-named their second child Aire. As for how you pronounce that, I figured “Aire” is just the exhausted exhale you make after hearing that Kylie Jenner gave her baby a name that sounds like a low-cost airline based in Europe. But according to Kylie herself, it’s simply pronounced AIR.

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Alfalfa From “The Little Rascals” Actor, Bug Hall, Was Banned From Twitter For Pushing His Dangerous “Parenting Methods”

December 8, 2022 / Posted by:

It looks like it’s high time for Butch to lace up his shit-kickers to beat the shorts off of the actor who played Alfalfa in 1994’s The Little Rascals movie, because former child actor, Bug Hall, has been telling on himself by talking about his cruel parenting techniques on Twitter. Bug, who was caught huffing next to a dumpster back in 2020, has four small daughters. Apparently, he’s gone the “Radical Traditional Catholic” (or “TradCath”) route which means that he’s been teaching his daughters about “marital debt.” Because of these tweets, his account has been permanently banned from Twitter. Trigger warnings galore head.

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Denise Richards Was Apparently “Blindsided” By A Judge Ruling That Charlie Sheen No Longer Owes Her Child Support

October 6, 2021 / Posted by:

In the Bravo throne room, ruler of the Housewives, Andy Cohen, is sitting smugly on his throne and waiting for the moment he can haughtily cackle before saying, “I KNEW you’d be back,” when Denise Richards comes crawling up to his hooves to beg for her Real Housewives of Beverly Hills gig back. Because this week, a judge ruled that Charlie Sheen no longer has to pay her child support for their two daughters, 16-year-old Lola and 17-year-old Sami, since both girls reportedly live with him. But sources tell People that Denise has accused Charlie of pulling shady and manipulative moves to get out of paying her the money he owes her and she was blindsided by the whole thing. Well, Denise should possibly prepare to bust out another SHOCK face, because I wouldn’t be surprised if Charlie goes after her for child support since she’s working more steadily than his ass is nowadays.

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A Botox-Free Paris Hilton Is Reportedly Pregnant With Her First Child (UPDATE: She Denies It)

July 27, 2021 / Posted by:

Add another to the list of Botox-free celebrities! 40-year-old Paris Hilton has volunteered some information about her face which nobody asked for or believes and told The Telegraph’s Stella magazine that she has never had Botox or fillers. Sure, Jan. But at the very least Paris won’t be getting any for some time because it’s been reported that she’s pregnant with a child she made with her fiancé, 40-year-old Carter Reum. Once that baby comes out and Paris sees how fresh its skin is compared to hers, we’ll see how long she stays off the injectables, though.

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After Pleading Guilty To Child Endangerment, Drake Bell Confirmed That He’s Somebody’s Father

July 7, 2021 / Posted by:

Last month, Nickelodeon kid star turned Subway-Jared-in-training, Drake Bell, took a plea deal in his child endangerment case and pleaded guilty to a fourth-degree felony charge of attempting to endanger children and a first-degree misdemeanor charge of disseminating material harmful to juveniles. Drake will be sentenced on July 12 and could be hit with up to two years in the clink. But since he’s famous-iiiiissssssh, he’ll probably get a slight slap on the wrist as the judge says, “My kids loved you in Drake & Josh!” Drake isn’t taking any chances, though, and so he’s confirmed that somebody actually made the decision to marry him and make a baby with him. So forget all about Drake Bell being a child-creeping predator! Look at the bright, shiny BABEH!

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Josh Duggar Has Been Charged With Receiving And Possessing Child Pornography

April 30, 2021 / Posted by:

Last night, we learned that Josh Duggar had been arrested in Arkansas, and was being held in federal custody. We didn’t know why at the time, and Michael K, who reported the news, threw out several guesses, like money laundering (which would be very on-brand for the Duggars), or child porn (which would be on-brand for Josh). Well, Josh Duggar has formally been charged with receiving and possessing child porn. Jill Duggar has probably never been more grateful that she stopped taking her family’s phone calls.

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