Family lawyers cracked open a bottle of champagne this morning while searching online for extra office space. Because Chris Brown now has two children, which means a 200% chance of bigger, messier money fights in his future.
These results would sound much better if they were delivered by Maury Povich. But Hunter BIden is the rich son of a former Vice President and current Presidential hopeful. So sadly, he’s too famous for Maury’s brown envelope of DNA truth. But the good news is, paternity drama isn’t reserved solely for daytime TV. Although…I guess technically that would be bad news for Hunter.
The royal family doesn’t waste any time when it comes to cranking out heirs and spares. Keep that in mind, ladies! Sure, you can get all the tiaras and the world, but your coochie picks up more traffic than the Atlanta airport the first few years pumping out ‘dem babies! That said, I don’t feel all that bad here. Prince Harry and Duchess Meghan weren’t married for all that long when baby Archie came into the world, and it sounds like Harry is already readyfor another. Continue reading
People says that Laura Prepon and her husband of 16 months Ben Foster are having another kid. They confirmed the news earlier today on Instagram. 39-year-old Laura and 38-year-old Ben are Scientologists, so I was kind of hoping for an on-brand pregnancy announcement post. Like a picture of Laura holding some E-meter cans and a caption that read: “I can’t suppress this news! Audit-it with Ben and now I’m pregnant!” Instead, we got a sweet picture of Laura’s 2-year-old daughter Ella using her baby belly as a convenient window-watching seat.
Based On His Name, Lauren Conrad Gave Birth To An Old-Timey Children’s Book Character (Who Might Be Peter Rabbit’s Enemy)
Lauren Conrad did not return to the new season of The Hills and instead she created a second human. Specifically, a second baby boy named Charlie Wolf Tell. I get that LC needs to stay on brand as being whimsical and needs to give her son a name she can later use for a kid’s line for Kohl’s. But she’s really wasting her husband’s last name of Tell by not naming one of her kids Kissyn or Showyn, or done a half-assed tribute to Antoine Dodson by naming him Runnyn. But no, she had to go with boring Charlie Wolf!
Nick Carter finally got around to announcing that his wife Lauren Kitt Carter had their second baby. For someone who practically has the press on speed-dial these days, Nick shocked the world by keeping the baby’s birth a secret for a whole week. And he didn’t even make the announcement through TMZ or Page Six or anything – he just threw up a picture on Instagram. AND! His new baby shares the same name as a multiple Oscar-nominated indie actress. Who is this Nick Carter, and why isn’t he posting, “Yeah boyeee, I straight-up just got another baby!” while eating wings from the hospital room on Snapchat?