Prince Harry Scoffs At Jeremy Clarkson’s Most Recent Attempt To Apologize For What He Wrote About Meghan Markle In The Sun
Winnie the Pooh is OUT as Jeremy Clarkson’s apology ghostwriter. Jeremy has issued a new public “mea culpa with bells on” to Instagram because “the people who called for it” were unmoved by Jeremy’s initial “Oh dear. I’ve rather put my foot in it” plea for absolution he posted on Twitter addressing the backlash he received over his column in The Sun in which he stated he hates Meghan Markle “on a cellular level” and how he fantasizes “of the day when she is made to parade naked through the streets of every town in Britain while the crowds chant, ‘Shame!’ and throw lumps of excrement at her.” Frankly, I’m shocked Pooh even took that gig to begin with. We don’t need Britain’s #1 tubby little cubby all stuffed with fluff ghostwriter associated with the likes of Jeremy. Jerm’s on his own now, and unfortunately, he still can’t get the job done. SilenCED no more; Prince Harry’s not having it.
Kevin, Preston, and Jayden Federline; Jamie Spears; Jamie Lynn Spears, and Lynne Spears have all been featured players on the Lazy Susan of Britney’s Biggest Botherers (with a guest appearance from Jason Alexander) even now that she’s twirled free of her years-long conservatorship. And though most would expect Britney Spears to be living her best life after over a decade of being under her father’s control, she’s seemed to have gotten angrier and angrier at all involved, judging by her (now deactivated) Instagram. But before she closed her account, Britney explained that she frequently pissed-posts because her family has never apologized or taken accountability for their treatment of her. In true Spears public-mess fashion, Lynne replied to Britney’s post with an apology and a plea for Britney to unblock her.
The New York Post reports that a nursing home in Taiwan had some ‘splaining to do after booking some unconventional entertainment for their Mid-Autumn Festival party. The Mid-Autumn Festival, aka the Moon Festival or Mooncake Festival, is an important Chinese holiday that celebrates the season’s rice and wheat harvests. Sadly, the last two Mid-Autumn Festival parties at the Taoyuan Veterans Home have been cancelled due to COVID. This year, staff wanted to make it up to their residents by doing something extra special. So they hired a stripper! That’ll lift their spirits (and more, if they timed their Viagra right)!
Last week, we bore witness to a hookup attempt that was sloppier than a Taco Bell Mexican Pizza on a Monday at midnight when Stranger Things teen, Noah Schnapp, went on TikTok and revealed (like any 17-year-old would) that Doja Cat asked him via DM to fetch her the digital info of his co-star, Joseph Quinn, because she was somehow too inept at using a search bar to figure it out on her own. Although Noah gave her what she came for, the fact that he didn’t keep it on the low displeased Doja, so she took to TikTok live and said that what Noah did was “snake shit,” “whack” and “socially unaware.” “’Socially unaware’ she says? That’s rich!” replied everyone. But it looks like all’s well that ends well, because Noah says that he apologized to Doja and they’re good now.
Oh no, can someone please update Courtney Love’s contact information on the group email? Because it’s obvious she didn’t get the memo that chiming in on the defamation lawsuit between Johnny Depp and Amber Heard will only result in the need to furiously backpedal on a 10-speed damage control bike. Was Courtney not paying attention during Drew Barrymore’s apology or what? Either way, Courtney recently learned a valuable lesson, which is that commenting on the Johnny Depp situation might end with you having to apologize for it later.
Jason Momoa And Eiza Gonzales Are Reportedly Dating And He Apologized For Taking Pictures Of The Sistine Chapel
Human bearskin rug Jason Momoa is keeping somebody warm at night other than Kate Beckinsale. According to People, Jason is currently dating Ambulance star Eiza Gonzalez. Sources say things between Jason and Eiza are casual at the moment, but he did attend the Ambulance premiere last month. Turns out there was nothing between Jason and Kate at the Vanity Fair Oscars party, she was just cold so Jason gave her his coat. But Eiza apparently has the privilege of lounging naked on Jason’s chest in front of a cozy fire.