I think we can now safely call Drake a “confirmed bachelor” without anybody getting bent out of shape about the historical implications of that designation since Drake himself is the one going out of his way to remind us that nobody is ever gonna wanna marry Him? Page Six reports that Drake has teamed up with custom jewelry designer to the stars and probable inspiration for Adam Sandler’s character in Uncut Gems, Alex Moss, to create a necklace called “Previous Engagements,” which is made from 42 enormous diamonds that weren’t big enough to fill the gaping hole in his heart, or, sadder yet, even get a stripper to bite.
Pour one out for Fran Drescher because if anybody’s legacy is going to be tarnished by the Don’t Worry Darling Disaster of 2022, it’s Fran who has lost the distinction of being the most loquacious professional child care provider of the modern era. Even worse, nowadays, when someone mentions “the nanny” in passing, they’re gonna have to be more specific- like are we walking about the show or Olivia Wilde and Jason Sedeikis’ nanny because either way, yeah, quite a mouth on her, eh? The Daily Mail published a third installment of their What Me Worry? interview with No, Not That The Nanny, who now claims that Florence Pugh hooked up with Harry Styles before Olivia did, and that is what really drove a wedge between Miss Flo and Miss Oh?. Mr. Him? could not be reached for comment.
The correct question to the answer “these two people were just announced as the permanent hosts of the beloved television quiz show Jeopardy!” is “Who are HIM?! and HER?!” As predicted, Jeopardy! executive producer Mike Richards has been named as Alex Trebek’s replacement, and fellow guest host Mayim Bialik will be hosting all of Jeopardy!’s primetime and spinoff series. Fan favorite LeVar Burton goes home with a lovely parting gift — walking away as a beloved icon with his dignity intact. Nobody could really replace Alex and you can’t get hit with rotten tomatoes if you exit stage left. And with this decision, people are already coming at Mike and Mayim and letting the fetid fruit fly!
What do a grizzled old un-cancellable anti-Semitic racist and a 20-year-old TikTok star who dances like a sedated toddler who has to pee have in common? Well, other than the obvious — inexplicable bologna breath — they both apparently worship Donald Trump! Blessedly we don’t always know where Donald Trump is at any given moment anymore like we did before he got evicted from both Twitter and The White House, but over the weekend he was in attendance at a UFC fight in Las Vegas. And Mel Gibson was there to greet him with a hale and hearty salute. Later, during the match, Addison Rae was filmed approaching Donald at his seat and introducing herself saying “I have to say hi, so nice to meet you.” Which, in turn, probably caused Donald’s alleged Mario Kart mushy to greet her with a hale and hearty salute.
I don’t know what it’s like in Malibu, but in my neck of the woods, “outside” is extremely unsexy at the moment, and running errands has become tantamount to LARPing The Walking Dead. So to see pictures of Norman Reedus out frolicking for the paparazzi with his girlfriend Diane Kruger during a global pandemic is unsettling, to say the least. Although, mostly still because, him?!?
Despite being an actor/DJ/model/”singer“ and his inability to grow a mustache, Ansel Elgort has his own rabid fandom. And surprise, surprise, they’re lunatics. Ansel will be starring as Tony in Steven Spielberg’s upcoming film remake of West Side Story. His co-star, the Maria to his Tony, is 18-year-old Rachel Zegler, an unknown who won the role in an open casting call. So at least one of them can sing. This should be a huge moment for Rachel, but it’s been sullied by the Elgort hive. After Ansel’s recent announcement that he is interested in pursuing platonic relationships with women who aren’t his girlfriend (aka friendships, you dummy), the nation of Elgortstan jumped in to call Rachel a homewrecker after she tweeted innocuous praise for her co-star. According to The Daily Mail, it was bad enough that Rachel decided to take a break from Twitter. All of which begs the question, him?