Bros, the gay rom-com starring and co-written by Billy Eichner, opened last week in theaters and immediately flopped. Billy put the blame on straight people not hitting the theaters to see it. Others put the blame on how only superhero movies, horror movies, and movies with big names make money at the box office. But apparently, this film also made history by using a $30,000 device to simulate the joys of tickling ass with your tongue. Not that it matters now, because the scene was ultimately cut after The White Lotus hit it first.
After “Bros” Bombed At The Box Office, Billy Eichner Said That Straight People Just Didn’t Show Up For It
Billy Eichner is a bit pissed off and roasted the heteros on Twitter for not supporting his gay romantic comedy, Bros, which was released this past Friday and received pretty amazing reviews. It has a 91% critics score and a 92% audience score on Rotten Tomatoes, but that wasn’t enough to get asses in the seats to see it. Bros only pulled in $4.8 million over the weekend. Billy took to Twitter to accuse the Straights™ of not holding up their end of the equality bargain and said that they “just didn’t show up for Bros..”
Last week former football player/virgin Bachelor disaster Colton Underwood announced his engagement to political strategist Jordan C. Brown. The two haven’t been dating a particularly long time; 30-year-old Colton only came out as gay last spring, and he and Jordan, 39, went Instagram-official at the end of 2021. But true love has no timeline. It also doesn’t have a prenup. Yep, the couple has no interest in signing a prenuptial agreement, because Colton says they’re “in it for the long haul.” Awww, that’s the kind of blind Christian optimism that inspires a closeted gay man to sign on to The Bachelor!
After teasing the first look at the series that will no doubt go on to sweep the Emmys and cause massive waves of mid-90s nostalgia for The Gap, FX has dropped the first trailer for Ryan Murphy’s Impeachment: American Crime Story. We get to see what everyone looks like in Impeachment-era styling, wigs, and prosthetics. Just like all Ryan Murphy projects, the results are achieved with varying degrees of success. Some look great (Beanie Feldstein’s turn as Monica Lewinsky) and others will make you wonder what is going on (Clive Owen’s best estimate of a Bill Clinton impression). But I have to hand it to Ryan for the perfect casting in that television above. Nothing brings me back to 1998 like the low-frequency buzz and aggressive static shock I’d get from sitting too close to the ol’ Sony Trinitron tube TV.
The next installment of Ryan Murphy’s American Crime Story is all about the impeachment of Bill Clinton, and we learned last year that Beanie Feldstein will play Monica Lewinsky, Annaleigh Ashford is Paula Jones, Sarah Paulson is Linda Tripp, and Clive Owen is William Jefferson “Slick Willie” Clinton. Deadline is giving us one more name to add to that list, and it’s prolific street yeller Billy Eichner, who has landed the role of Matt Drudge, the first person to publish the news of the Lewinsky scandal.
Billy Eichner voices Timon in the all-CGI The Lion King movie which my friend is seeing three times this weekend, so that should tell you everything you need to know about her sex life. During the London premiere of the movie, the stars got the chance to meet Prince Harry and Duchess Meghan. Well guess what, Billy claims Beyoncé got nervous meeting them! Have fun hearing from The Beygency, Billy, because they’re definitely going to wake you up in the middle of the night and drag you down to their headquarters to ask you how you’d like to be punished for breaking your NDA! Ask, Tiffany Haddish!