Lana Del Rey Used Beyonce As An Example Of A Double Standard She Faces As A Glamorous Person
It seems to me that Lana Del Rey has been pretty successful in her career given the fact that I know who she is even though I’m not familiar with her music apart from having a pretty strong feeling it’s the kind of thing one might listen to while wistfully staring out a foggy kitchen window at the rain, wearing a flouncy housecoat and ignoring the screaming kettle that’s sitting on a vintage Wedgwood stove behind you. Her brand is that strong.
However, according to a recent Instagram post, Lana busted out the ye old-timey typewriter font on her notes app and wrote that she feels she’s been “crucified” every time she sings about “feeling beautiful” or “whatever I want,” whereas her rivals are rewarded with “number one songs” for singing about “wearing no clothes,” and name-checking Beyoncé (among others), in the process. Naturally, this statement went over like a lead balloon or Lana on .0005mg of melatonin (it does not take much).
Lisa Kudrow Says That “Friends” Would Not Have An All-White Cast Today
Friends came out in 1994 and even then people pointed out that it made NYC look like a place where really no people of color existed and where you could afford a gigantic ass Manhattan apartment from only working 5 hours a week. Well, Lisa Kudrow spoke out about that. The lack of POC thing. Not the whole “they must’ve been undercover drug dealers to afford that apartment” thing.
Prince Hot Ginge Is Lonely And Bored In Los Angeles. Aren’t We All?!
I really should be trolling Craigslist Los Angeles for posts from royal lonely gingers who are looking for friends, but instead I’m here writing about a royal lonely ginger who is looking for friends. Priorities: mine are not in check.
As Emily Giffin frantically writes Something Blue Is Ginger about a sad ginger prince whose diabolically evil trash wife keeps him trapped in their mansion and alienates him from his family while refusing to put pants on her baby (Will CPS please step in?!), a source tells Vanity Fair that PHG is a little lost after moving to Los Angeles since he doesn’t have friends or a purpose at the moment. He shouldn’t be too surprised about that since I’m pretty sure that on Los Angeles’ welcome sign are the words: The Home Of No Real Friends And No Real Purpose BUT Lots Of Hiking!
Khloe Kardashian And Tristan Thompson Filed A Cease And Desist Letter Against A Woman Claiming Tristan Is Her Kid’s Father
Yesterday, Khloe Kardashian got clowned on Twitter over rumors that she was pregnant with her ex Tristan Thompson’s baby. While Khloe neither confirmed nor denied those rumors, she made it clear that she doesn’t appreciate people speculating or discussing her so-called private life. Well, Tristan’s sperm is making headlines again as he and Khloe have filed a cease and desist letter against Kimberly Alexander, a woman who claims that Tristan is the father of her 6-year-old son. Poor Kalamity Kuppy Kakes is still wiping the whipped cream from her eye, just to get squirted in the other eye with a forceful stream of seltzer thanks to Tristan’s vagabond peen. I’d sure hate to walk a mile in her big red shoes.
Afternoon Crumbs
Kristen Stewart is supposedly still in love right now, but her down-low bits probably perked up over the news that a Hollywood lesbian couple has split up and now two famous ladies are on the market. Ashley Benson and Cara Delvingne have quit each other after two years together. But what I really need to know is: Who got custody of the sex bench??????!? – Just Jared
Look at that gorgeous blond bitch. And oh yeah, Chris Hemsworth looks good too, I guess – Lainey Gossip
Pocket daddy Stanley Tucci is back to stirring up the cuccis on the internet by using his biceps to stir up a martini – Pajiba
Elon Musk’s New Baby Is Here, And Is Probably Already Looking Into A Legal Name Change
As expected, French Canadian music weirdo Grimes gave birth to her first child with Elon Musk, and the little future trust funder is a baby boy. It’s entirely too appropriate that Elon decided to wear a shirt that said OCCUPY MARS for the first time he met his new baby son. Because Elon recently revealed the name he and Grimes chose for their baby, and it sounds like they picked their name at random from a sub-orbital space shuttle instruction manual. You’re shocked, I’m sure!