According to The Takeout, a chain of grocery stores in the UK is selling giant bags of eggs, floating in their own disgusting puddle of water and yolk juice––that’s right, somebody high-up at this grocery store called their staff together and, with a completely straight face, said to them: put a bunch of sloppy boiled eggs into a giant sack, fill it with water and watch as they fly off of the shelves. Even if I could comprehend the act of saving some time in the morning by purchasing pre-cooked eggs, I think my gag-reflex would probably have a few things to say.
Chris Rock did a big interview with The Hollywood Reporter to promote the fourth season of Fargo, which he’s in, and no, he didn’t once again explain himself for bringing out too-dumb-for-Fox-News Stacey Dash at the Oscars, but he did talk a lot about aging and said that at 55 years old, he was diagnosed with nonverbal learning disorder (NVLD).
Tonight is the big, 85-hour-long Emmys main event, but because there are approximately 9,876,988 Emmys to give out, the Creative Arts Emmys have been happening all week long. Nicole Byer hosted the five-night event, and she was up for the Emmy for Outstanding Host For A Reality Or Competition Program, making her the first Black woman to be nominated for that award. But RuPaul won that Emmy, as Nicole stood by thinking, “They got me to host this shit and didn’t even give me the Emmy?!” No, apparently, Nicole knew she was no match for Ru!
The 25th Bond movie No Time To Die hasn’t come out yet (it’s supposed to come out on November 20 after its original release date was pushed due to coronavirus), but there’s already a claim as to which white guy with nice pecs will jump from burning buildings or swings from chandeliers, crashing through a plate-glass window without a scratch, and slip into Daniel Craig’s tuxedo to play the new James Bond. Well, there’s one claim that James Bond WILL be played by everyone’s favorite camwhore Tom Hardy. That sound you just heard was Hard Up To Play Bond team member Henry Cavill destroying his nerd machine in a fit of rage!
When it comes to commitment, there is dedication––and then there’s Duane “The Rock” Johnson who will literally tear the shit out of a wrought-iron gate rather than be late for work. And that’s exactly what happened yesterday when he was faced with a looming deadline that just could not be missed. I, for one, think this was a bad move. I mean, what a dummy. He had the ultimate rich-person excuse for staying home: “Sorry guys, I can’t come into work today. The gate outside of my mansion was acting up and wouldn’t open for me. Now I’m stuck inside. I’ll probably need the weekend off, too.”
Yes, Katie Holmes and her new boyfriend, Emilio Vitolo, Jr., were papped again yesterday, exploring each others mouths. This time in and around NYC’s Central Park, masks strapped comically to their chins each time. Like, girl, we get it. You’re in love. You escaped Tom Cruise and Jamie Foxx, so you deserve it. But please, take him to, like, Barneys and get him a fedora or a stetson hat or something and throw that pageboy cap into the Jackie O reservoir. Seriously, nobody is getting paparazzi attention on this coast like Katie and Emilio––Ana de Armas is positively SHOOK!