I’m beginning to feel bad for THE QUEEN. Poor thing has probably had to up her booze intake to eighteen daily G&Ts instead of her usual five on account that 2018 is the year of NO DAMN MANNERS by those rotten Americans. First, Duchess Meghan is presumably playing a one-woman game of how many royal traditions she can break before she caps it with a finale of a Fourth of July fireworks spectacle off the roof of Buckingham Palace just to really rub it into those pesky Brits. Now Susan Sarandon is getting in on the action by having the audacity to speak to QE2 before being spoken to. Susan probably just wanted to tell QE2, “Just wanted to say, ‘You’re welcome,’ because if Hilary became president all of our countries would be at war right now.”
Somewhere in Hollywood, former E! hostess Catt Sadler just passed her phone over to former co-worker Jason Kennedy and is now drumming her manicured nails on the coffee shop’s table and glaring at him while he watches this video. During an interview with the BBC, political firebrand and Debra Messing voodoo doll owner Susan Sarandon told a heartwarming tale about dearly departed Hollywood royalty Paul Newman. She says that Paul once gave her half of his salary from a movie in the interest of equal pay. Menz, take note. Cool Hand Luke was as handsome on the inside as on the out.
There was a lot of messy fashion at the SAG Awards last night (prepare yourself accordingly after that jump below!). But obviously any effort that was put in was immediately cancelled out the second Kate Hudson returned to the scene of last year’s fashion crime and fully outdid herself in a fluffy Valentino vision of countrified love. I say love because, duh, the hearts a’plenty, but also because I love this dress. What’s not to love? Black velvet (check), pink beauty pageant chiffon (check), a high-lace neckline with corresponding bib of ruffles (checking furiously). The only thing missing is a pink parasol. Kate probably left it in the limo for fear of being mistaken for Miley Cyrus in a knock-off production of My Fair Lady called Decent Lookin’ Gal.
Here’s who else showed up and sizzled eyeballs with style.
You could just tell from Darren Aronofsky’s rambling on and on and on and…you get the idea…about his twisted Sunday School of a movie, mother!, that he just KNEW he was going to spend the night of the Oscars collecting statue after statue and rubbing shoulders with Meryl Streep. Instead, he’ll get the chance to maybe be the muse for James Franco’s next movie about a turd of a movie (well, if he’s even allowed to make movies again). That’s right, the 38th annual Golden Raspberry Awards nominees were released today, and it looks like those Fifty Shades Of Shit movies have some competition from mother!. Continue reading
Since September 2016, former USA Gymnastics team doctor Larry Nassar has been accused by 140 women, many who were minors, of sexual abuse. He was hit with several charges and pleaded guilty to molesting 10 girls. He’s already been sentenced to 60 years in prison on child porn charges, and faces another 25-to-life if enough of his alleged victims speak up in court. Nearly 100 women are expected to give victim impact statements in court.
The only problem was that some of his victims were threatened with a hefty $100,000 fine if they did speak out. Like former USA Gymnastics national team member McKayla Maroney, who accused Larry Nassar of molesting her starting at the age of 13. Many famous people offered to pay McKayla’s fine so she can testify, but they don’t have to do that now. USA Gymnastics released a statement last night assuring McKayla she wouldn’t get a $100,000 penalty for talking about Larry Nassar.
The brown-haired, dead-eyed wooden model named Bella Hadid is currently at Cannes. And the other brown-haired, dead-eyed wooden model named Emily RideAJetski is also at Cannes, and at yesterday’s premier of Nelyubov, she dropped massive amounts of black lace under-titty classiness on the red carpet. That’s a whole lot of look, but it’s Cannes! If you’re not delivering a whole lot of look, take your ass to the People’s Choice Awards. Although, since Emily is permanently suffering from a severe case of dehydration, she’d wear this to the People’s Choice Awards too.
It looks like some of the worst trends simultaneously caca’d all over Emily. Underboob? Check! Chichis window? Check! Nude illusion? Check!
On I Love Lucy, Lucy would sometimes wear this glamorous sheer housecoat thing over cigarette pants and it was a perfect vision of elegance, and Emily RideAJetSki’s look is like the NastyDress.com version of that. This is something Sophia Loren would’ve worn back in the day if she was tacky, on a budget and suffered from narcolepsy so she needed a fluffy duvet handy for quick naps.
And just when you thought that Emily RideAJetSki reached the pinnacle of elegance with this look, she faced the front and showed off a crotch seam that looks like a never-ending sparkly landing strip (see: first picture in the gallery and prepare to be hit by the classiness of it all).
Here’s more from the Nelyubov premiere and I also threw in pictures from today’s Okja premiere because I just couldn’t ignore Tilda Swinton looking like a glorious albino alien mother of the bride.
Pics: Backgrid, Wenn.com