Susan Sarandon Says That Cher Stole Her Role In “The Witches Of Eastwick”

October 21, 2020 / Posted by:

Debra Messing can really put her shank down finally because Susan Sarandon has decided that she really wants to hear a bouncer angel say, “Sorry, you’re not on the list, bitch,” while trying to get into the gates of heaven by starting an all-out war (not really, not at all) with honorary earth angel Cher. But Susan threw a PLOT TWIST at us, because even though she’s on Team Biden My Tongue And Voting For Joe and Cher is fully on Team Biden, this isn’t about politics. Susan has poured some 33-year-old tea by telling us that the role of Alexandria in The Witches of Eastwick was originally hers but that Cher, seen above exquisitely working one of The Slut Dress’ ancestors, swooped in and took it from her.

Wikipedia tells me that Angelica Huston, who was Jack Nicholson’s girlfriend at the time, was originally considered for Alexandra, but after giving a bad audition, the role went to Cher. But Susan told a different story while talking to Michael Cristofer, who wrote Witches of Eastwick, to promote an Eastwick-themed “home brewing” event on Saturday to raise money for Project Angel Food. Susan claims that she was cast in Cher’s role, but right before filming started, she learned that she was switched to the role of Jane and had to become an overnight Yo-Yo Ma, via Page Six:

“I initially was cast in Cher’s part, and didn’t find out till I got to LA — because I was living in Rome — that I was actually moved to a different part,” she recalled. “I had to learn suddenly to play the cello, and I had never played an instrument in my life. They said they would sue me if I left, so I didn’t have much choice!”

Michael Cristofer co-signed Susan’s claim, and Susan implied that since Cher had fucked the movie’s producer Jon Peters (aka Not-Legal Mr. Pamela Anderson), it helped her get the part.

“Cher sort of muscled her way into that part,” Cristofer said. Sarandon replied, “That’s Jon … [He] and Cher had a past liaison or something, so that  was another element.”

Even though Susan THINKS that Cher’s stunning snatch snatched her part away, Susan, Cher, and Michelle Pfeiffer all got along, and that there were several reasons why they shouldn’t have but “everybody took a higher road.”

Susan also said that she could’ve been in The First Wives Club, but she turned down one of the roles (she didn’t say which one) because she didn’t want to partake in a women-hating-on-women plot (and she admits she has never seen the finished movie):

“[It] ended up making a lot of money. It starred all great women, who were getting revenge on their ex-husbands, in the script that I got, by being mean to other women. And I was just like … who needs that, you know? I don’t want to be in something where women are tearing down other women.”

Both Hillary Clinton and Cher’s stunning snatch are side-eyeing that last line.

But really, Cher didn’t steal shit. Susan Sarandon was just unknowingly a second-choice placeholder just in case Cher decided to not grace that movie with her magnificent presence. It’s sort of kind of like when a Grindr trick says to me, “I’ll hit you up if my first, second, third, fourth, fifth, and sixth through eightieth choice falls through, and you are the last human on earth, living or dead, with a hole.

Pic: Warner Bros.

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