Just last Wednesday Armie Hammer appeared to be getting cozy with Rumer Willis when he was spotted with his arm around her waist on the streets of L.A. Little did we know that just two days earlier, Armie was spotted getting cozy at lunch with another woman entirely! According to Page Six, Armie had lunch in West Hollywood with writer Jessica Ciencin Henriquez who recently split with her ex-husband Josh Lucas who apparently suffered from a serious case of wandering peen syndrome. Will we ever find a cure? To recap, there have now been two verified reports of recently separated Armie Hammer getting cozy without the aid of a fireplace nor comfy blanket. What’s his secret?!?!?!
Rumor has it that Rumer has it for Armie Hammer. According to Page Six, Rumer Willis was spotted walking armie-in-armie with Armie yesterday in Los Angeles. Fresh off of cosplaying Kim Kardashian for a new ad campaign for Skims, Rumer’s apparently doubling down on her questionable associations by kicking it with a recently separated man who has more dubious opinions than a soccer stadium full of artificial assholes.
I’m envious of Elizabeth Chambers who, after 10 years of marriage, was able to divorce Armie Hammer while the rest of us, after 10 long years of trying to make Armie Hammer happen, still have to endure Armie Hammer. Armie, AKA The Silver Spoon Socialist, has once again #TakentoTwitter with some political hot takes. Following in the footsteps of Susan Sarandon, Armie tweeted, then deleted, a case for “another American revolution” over voting for Joe Biden. Armie may have taken a bite out of a mushy cum filled peach, but is he ready to have Debra Messing take a bite out of him? Because other than being Megan Mullally, this is the best way to get Messinged with.
And with this split, coronavirus is looking back and forth between Armie Hammer and Elizabeth Chambers like, “Well, am I to blame or not?!” because he claims they split up in January while she claims they split up this month. Whatever the case may be, Armie and Elizabeth both filed for divorce today after 10 years of marriage. We should’ve known this was coming when Armie debuted his Central Florida hitchhiking grifter circa 1988 look. Bitch was got extra hot to hit the scene again!
Armie Hammer Went On A Blocking Spree On Twitter After Criticism Of His Posts About The BLM Protests
The Caribbean’s most dedicated social justice warrior in the category of rich white people who fled the pandemic, Armie Hammer, has been wielding the block hammer on Twitter of late. It seems that while Armie has heard the message that now is the time to amplify Black voices, he’s not applying the principle in his activism.
According to ONTD, Twitter users have accused Armie of blocking fans who tried to argue with him, saying he is only listening to “people he respects and admires.” And over on Instagram, Armie lashed out with insults after he was criticized for highlighting “copoganda,” feel-good images of cops kneeling in front of protesters, on his Instagram stories. Armie it seems, was not content to just sit there and eat his conch stew.
I have got to hand it to Matt Damon. Two years ago, after getting dragged like a burlap sack full of bricks for his comments about diversity and a “spectrum of behavior” in regards to #metoo, he said he was going to keep his trap shut moving forward. And he has! I haven’t heard a single regrettable hot take from Matt ever since. And unlike his BestBro4Life Ben Affleck, who feeds off of flashbulbs like some kind of LED vampire, we haven’t seen hide nor hair of Matt or his family since coronavirus came a-knockin’. Well, according to The New York Times, that’s because Matt’s been holed up in a small Irish town called Dalkey, much to the delight of the locals. Though they seem more delighted by the absurdity of the situation, insomuch as why anyone would give a rat’s ass, sorry, rat’s arse, where Matt Damon is than at the possibility of a chance encounter. Bono lives there too. Trust me, they have seen it all.