Tom Cruise Hurt Himself On The Set Of “Mission: Impossible 6”

August 14, 2017 / Posted by:

David Miscavige better hop in Scientology’s private jet and get his ass over to London, England with his favorite nurse’s uniform, because his best buddy Tom Cruise needs some tender loving care today. Tom had a very real moment on the set of Mission: Impossible 6 yesterday, and it was more real and intense than a thousand couch-jumps and Matt Lauer “You’re glib” show-downs combined. According to TMZ, Tom was injured pretty bad during a stunt when he attempted to leap from one building to another.

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Crocs Must Lip-Synch For Their Life

August 14, 2017 / Posted by:

The go-to footwear for Mario Batali and Memaws and Pepaws at The Villages in Florida (how else would they shuffle between old timer sex parties??) is on life support!

The New York Post reports Crocs got slapped back from the patent folks after spending years suing rivals for stealing their design… this is kind of like when you hear someone is trying to steal your eccentric uncle’s ’82 El Camino. Sometimes you just let a broad take that shit! The brand is also cutting back on how many stores it runs: Continue reading

Hot Slut Of The Day!

August 14, 2017 / Posted by:

Jibba Jabber!

Long, long before some growns soothed their splintery nerves with those annoying fidget spinners (Side note: Us real mature growns still soothe our splintery nerves with weed, porn and passively aggressively fighting with relatives about politics on Facebook.), a toy company named Ertl did some damage control by trying to pass off their Jibba Jabber doll as a stress reliever.

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Birthday Sluts

August 14, 2017 / Posted by:

Jackée Harry (61)
Tim Tebow (30)
Nick Grimshaw (33)
Princess Love (33)
Mila Kunis (34)
Spencer Pratt (34)
Ana Matronic (43)
Christopher Gorham (43)
Jay Manuel (45)
Preston Lacy (48)
Jennifer Flavin (49)
Catherine Bell (49)
Adrian Lester (49)
Halle Berry (51)
Lady Bunny (55)
Susan Olsen (56)
Sarah Brightman (57)
Marcia Gay Harden (58)
Magic Johnson (58)
Carl Lumbly (66)
Danielle Steel (70)
Antonio Fargas (71)
Susan Saint James (71)
Steve Martin (72)
Wim Wenders (72)
David Crosby (76)
Alice Ghostley (1923-2007)

Pic: NBC/Getty

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Open Post: Hosted By The Fart Beat In A Backstreet Boys Song

August 13, 2017 / Posted by:

One of my favorite album covers of all time is Millie Jackson’s Back To The Shit, featuring the hit single “Muffle That Fart.” It’s true artistry, touching on so many timeless issues. Feminism, relationships, digestive issues. And it’s rare – who ever mentions toilets or farting in popular music nowadays? This isn’t exactly the same thing but sort of related. The Backstreet Boys spoke to Billboard about the 20th anniversary of their debut, Backstreet Boys. Did you know their song “The Call” was built around the sound of a fart? I didn’t know that. I didn’t really need to.

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Here’s The “Jersey Shore” Reunion Trailer….. But Where’s Snooki’s Pickle?

August 13, 2017 / Posted by:

The first trailer for the Jersey Shore reunion was released, and anyone with any marketing know-how would have done this trailer right. They would have opened it with old b&w footage of former Jersey Shore hobbitess (and current thinner Jersey Shore hobbitess) Snooki celebrating pickles back in the day and how much she loves those dick substitutes them. And then new 2017 footage of a svelte Snooki talking about how she might have lost weight but she still loves those dick substitutes pickles! It would hearken back to the old days, and comfort the viewer by showing nothing’s changed that much. Then again, it’s E! and all of their marketing intelligentsia are on the Kardashian project and mostly concerned with making that family palatable to humans. Continue reading

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