Category: Princess Anne
Prince Philip Has Been Laid To Rest
A week after Prince Philip, THE QUEEN’s husband and companion of 73 years, died at 99, he was laid to rest in St. George’s Chapel at Windsor Castle. And well, I should’ve expected this, but I caught a case of the sad feelings in the heart area from seeing THE QUEEN sitting all alone inside the chapel. Couldn’t someone have soothed the sads a bit by handing her one of her new Corgi puppies, all dressed in mourning black?!
The Royal Family Will Not Wear Military Uniforms To Prince Philip’s Funeral
Yesterday we learned that Prince Andrew wanted to bid adieu to his dearly departed daddy Prince Philip in an Admiral’s uniform, which was a weird thing to want to do, considering Prince Andrew never held the naval rank of Admiral. He was supposed to one day, but it didn’t happen, due to Andrew getting caught up in a sex trafficking situation and being forced to retreat from public life. There were rumors that Queen Elizabeth had to approve Andrew’s request, and the bad news for Andrew is that she didn’t do it. It would be very fun to laugh at Andrew slinking into church with a pissed-off pouty scowl on his face because Mummy made him wear some off-the-rack suit and not the fancy little military costume he wanted, but that’s not really the case here. According to sources, no one will be in military uniform at Prince Philip’s funeral this Saturday.
Princess Anne Wishes That Younger Royals Would Go Back To Basics
“Well, she’s obviously talking about us since William and Kate never left BASIC,” said a catty Prince Hot Ginge before throwing his copy of Vanity Fair onto a lounger and snapping at his Los Angeles pool boy to slather more SPF Infinity & Beyond onto his freckled bottom crumpets. Listen, during these times, just let me have my PHG/pool boy fantasy.
Vanity Fair’s May cover story is devoted entirely to THE QUEEN’s only daughter Princess Anne, and even though there’s a lot of messiness going on in the royal family right now (PHG and Meghan Markle leaving, Prince Andrew being a part-time resident of Pedophile Island, etc…), Princess Anne didn’t get into anything like that and her profile doesn’t really deliver anything new. But she did throw a look of disagreement at the young tricks of the royal family for trying to be *~diFferEnt~* instead of just shutting up and cutting that damn ribbon at a hospital wing opening.
None Of The Senior Royals Attended Prince Andrew’s 60th Birthday Party
According to The Daily Mail, Prince Andrew celebrated his 60th birthday with a scaled down intimate family gathering instead of the “lavish bash” (via New York Post) his mother The Queen had previously planned for him. It was so intimate in fact, that his own siblings, Prince Charles, Princess Anne and Prince Edward, were not in attendance. Instead, it was just Andrew and mumsy sitting criss-cross applesauce on the dining room table with a sad Tesco birthday cake between them like Sam and Jake Ryan in Sixteen Candles. Oh, and Formula One racing billionaire Bernie Ecclestone was also there. Plus a few others. But just like 50 people including China’s UK ambassador Liu Xiaoming and “racing heir” Guy Sangster and his wife Fiona. Fun fact: Andrew partied with Guy and Fiona at Tramp nightclub “just 72 hours” after he, allegedly, profusely sweated upon Virginia Giuffre at the very same club!
Princess Anne’s Daughter Zara Tindall Lost Her License For Six Months
Zara Tindall picked the right month to get her driver’s license yanked by the cops after getting caught speeding around her neighborhood. Because something tells me it’s not exactly going to register on her granny’s bad behavior radar at the moment. I don’t know, just a hunch.
A Royal Source Claims Princess Anne Did Not Intentionally Snub The Trumps
This is terrible news for people who love public acts of pettiness and also hate Donald Trump. The shady shrug felt ’round the world might not have actually been that shady, as it turns out. People magazine says that a British journalist tried to clear the air about Princess Anne’s “These hands are for shrugging, not shaking” gesture at the Buckingham Palace reception for NATO leaders on Tuesday. And according to them, it wasn’t what it looked like.