Open Post: Hosted By A Guy Dressed As Gandalf Running Into Ian McKellen During A “Lord Of The Rings”-Themed Bar Crawl
Last Thursday, University of Bristol music student Ben Coyles turned 22, and, to celebrate, he and his friends embarked on a Lord of the Rings-themed pub crawl. People went as elves, Ents, Orcs, and Eyes of Sauron, but birthday boy Ben dressed up as Gandalf. Specifically Gandalf the Grey. And it turned out this was the right costume choice because, as Ben and his Fellowship ventured to their penultimate pub just before midnight, they bumped into the real Gandalf, aka Sir Ian McKellen! Ben tells the Bristol Post that he was absolutely “flabbergasted.” Wow, it’s a Tolkien nerd’s dream come true!
In America, healthcare workers have been prioritized as the first people to receive the eagerly anticipated (for most) COVID-19 vaccine. But in Britain apparently, they’re doing people with titles first as is their prerogative. Wizards and old folks are next. So it makes sense that Sir Ian McKellen, being a senior titled wizard and all, would be at the front of the line. BBC News shares that 81-year-old Sir Ian said he felt “euphoric” after receiving the Pfizer vaccine at Queen Mary’s University Hospital in London.
After we were promised that the Cats movie was going to be every layer of insane, and after everyone prepared to throw their pussies against the screen from getting teased with Idris Elba shaking his shit as the mysterious criminal pussy overlord Macavity, the trailer finally hit our eyeballs and souls, and you better grab a gallon jug of holy water and hide the cat nip before pressing play. Because it is a night terror for all your senses. It does not disappoint.
They honestly should’ve waited until August 26 to release this trailer, because that’s International Dog Day, and this hacked-up musical hairball is a gift to canines everywhere. They’re all going to howl with happiness into the air over how Hollywood did catmanity. If this doesn’t cause all cats to finally rise up against us evil humans, I don’t know what will.
If you took your Lord of The Rings DVD box-set and dramatically fed each disk to a blazing fire on account of Sir Ian McKellen’s bad hot take on Kevin Spacey and Bryan Singer, why’d you do that? The fumes will kill you! Also, Ian has apologized. Comments Ian made on the #QueerAF podcast last week surfaced, and they were ick-nasty. He posited that Kevin and Bryan’s predatory behavior was a result of their having been closeted. He said if they were open about “themselves and their desires, they wouldn’t have started abusing people” which is patently absurd. Thankfully, Ian has seen the light, which is hard to avoid when your publicist is pointing a flashlight directly into your peep-holes.
I guess running lines with Taylor Swift on the Cats set is getting to Ian McKellen because he gave an interview recently where he was asked about #MeToo and the likes of Kevin Spacey and Bryan Singer. Ian has already waded into the #MeToo soundbite waters juuuuust enough to make his publicist want to toss back a giant martini. Wellp, he did it again by blaming Kevin and Bryan’s horrible behavior on being closeted.
“Memoryyyyy…I still get chills when I think…of how awkward it was when….a man in a spandex cat suit slunk up to me in the audience of Caaaaaats.” Can you tell I’m still traumatized by the time fate dealt me the hand of hell by having me sit in an aisle seat for my first viewing of Cats? I am not an audience participation type, and so yeah – an aisle seat for Cats wasn’t a great experience. But I’m still a fan of Cats. So even though I cringed a little at “Taylor Swift,” I’m still into this news. Mostly because a film adaptation means there’s zero chance she’ll leap off the screen and do weird cat pantomimes around me while I try to hide behind my popcorn bag.