It’s been one year since R. Kelly was found guilty of racketeering and sex trafficking charges in New York. So how did Lady Justice decide to celebrate the one-year anniversary of R. Kelly finally getting hit with a GO TO FUCKING PRISON card? Well, Lady Justice celebrated by serving up more justice. Yesterday in Chicago, a jury declared that R. Kelly is guilty of several “child pornography counts” and “several counts of enticement of a minor to engage in criminal sexual activity.” 55-year-old R. Kelly is already serving a 30-year prison sentence in NY, and now he’s facing another 10 to 90 years in the chokey. So if you’re ever down in the dumps and need a quick pick-me-up, just remind yourself that R. Kelly will probably rot in prison.
The final chapter in Ghislaine Maxwell’s story as one of the grosses main characters in the Jeffrey Epstein sex trafficking saga has finally come to a close today (possible title of that book: Is There A Place Hotter Than Hell For These Two?). Nearly six months after Ghislaine Maxwell was found guilty of five charges, including sex trafficking a minor, it was time to return to court and discuss sentencing. Lo and behold, Ghislaine will be locked away for 20 years.
Married Matthew Morrison Reportedly Got Fired From “So You Think You Can Dance” Because Of “Flirty” Messages He Sent To A Contestant
Matthew Morrison was cast as a judge in the 17th season of Fox’s So You Think You Can Dance, but now he’s out after announcing that he had “broken production protocols.” While rumors circled about why Matthew lost the gig, now we have a reported answer. Matthew, who is married to Renee Puente, was allegedly flirting with one of the contestants in the DMs. The lines between Matthew Morrison and Mr. Schue continue to be every kind of BLURRY.
Fox’s So You Think You Can Dance started up again on May 18 after taking a break to let viewers’ eardrums heal from Mary Murphy’s screeches pounding them into grounded-up eardrum meat. The last season, which was season 16, aired in 2019 and the 17th season featured a new judging panel made up of Stephen “tWitch” Boss, a ponytail-less JoJo Siwa, and Justin Timberlake’s Wednesday matinee understudy Matthew Morrison (aka creepy teacher extraordinaire Mr. Schue from Glee). But after just two episodes, Matthew was told, “So you think you can dance out the exit door?”, because he has jazz-walked off of the SYTCD stage. The reason he gave is that he did not “follow competition protocols,” and the rest of his statement makes it sound like he got too friendly with at least one contestant. What a Mr. Schue thing to do.
Well, it looks like Jim Bob and Michelle Duggar’s heave-inducing pleas for the judge to go easy on their pedophile son, Josh Duggar, fell harder than Michelle’s hair in humidity (or Jim Bob’s failed Senate campaign). Because Mr. Potato Head’s child-touching trash nephew was sentenced today to 12 and a half years in federal prison for possessing child sex abuse materials. If only cameras were allowed in the courtroom. My drug of choice today would be watching the smug fall off of Josh’s face as he was sentenced. But then again, I’m pretty sure the smug is permanently stuck to his mug.
Prince William and Duchess Kate are currently on a royal tour of the Caribbean, in honor of Queen Elizabeth’s Platinum Jubilee, and as seen above, they recently paid a visit to Jamaica yesterday. The reception was mixed, to say the least. The Jamaican citizens in the picture above seem to be enjoying whatever boring story Willy is telling them. But not everyone was so thrilled at their arrival. Dozens of Jamaican leaders have decided to protest the visit, just like what happened when Will and Kate hit up Belize, due to the Royal Family’s colonial past. William and Kate better enjoy all those happy smiles they’re seeing on this visit because it might be their last time being greeted with anything besides a cold shoulder and directions to the nearest Howard Johnson. Jamaica is currently making plans to do what they need to do to evict William’s granny out of her seat as Jamaica’s head of state.