Hot Slut Of The Day!
Georgie Dann!
If you asked me a couple of weeks ago who Georgie Dann is, I’d reach deep into my asshole, and after pushing away Jimmy Hoffa’s severed arm and Kanye West’s lost sense of reason, I’d pull out a bullshit answer by saying, “Georgie Dann is a Steely Dan cover band fronted by Prince George and they perform exclusively in the Buckingham Palace dining room after family dinners.” But I learned about the existence of the real Georgie Dann thanks to reader CinnamonGirl who dropped him into my box as a HSOTD nomination.
Dlisted: The Podcast, Episode 22 – It’s That Messy Time Of Year
And by “messy time of year,” we of course mean Halloween. Allison and I talk about our Halloween costumes from the past, like her Yoko OnoYouDidnt get-up and my No Ass Mariah costume. We also get into The Onion-like story of Lena Dunham writing a movie about a Syrian refugee, Josh Duhamel needing to grow a sense of humor, the ongoing saga of Sofia Vergara and Nick Loeb’s frozen embryos, 50 Cent and Ja Rule’s middle school playground beef. We end this episode by diving back into Halloween and reading some scary and ridiculous stories you all sent in. Two things I learned are to never live in a 19th century farmhouse, and if I ever meet Lisa Marie Fucking Presley, only talk about Elvis to her.
You can listen to us on iTunes, Stitcher, TuneIn, iHeartRadio, and Google Play. If you’ve got some feedback (Note: This Halloween episode was haunted by the ghost of sound issues) or want advice from two messes, e-mail us at [email protected]!
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HUGE NEWS: Duchess Meghan’s First Photographer Credit Has Landed On Kensington Palace Twitter
This just in! Duchess Meghan owns a camera and took a photo of her husband, Prince Harry! Then that photo was uploaded to the Kensington Palace Twitter page! Get out your royal journal and mark October 27, 2018 as another Meghan “first” underneath the entry for “Meghan eats her first Vegemite toast.“ Royals- they’re just like us!
Dlisted: The Podcast, Episode 21 – The Unsurprising Breakup Of Megyn Kelly And The Peacock
After I take off my tinfoil hat (or “aluminum foil hat” as my dumbass calls it) about the lottery being rigged, Allison and I get neck deep in the blackface messiness that Megyn Kelly created for herself. Once we cleanse ourselves, we talk about how Jennifer Garner’s new boyfriend might be a robot, and we learn that we chose the wrong path in life. We should’ve been a TV actress with a zillion endorsement deals named Sofia Vergara. Then we quickly talk about how many women John Mayer has humped on and who was the biggest ho on the set of Grease. We end our show by asking you to use your ears to try to the guess the voices of two legendary sopranos and one newly found soprano songbird… or songdonkey in this case.
You can listen to us on iTunes, Stitcher, TuneIn, iHeartRadio, and Google Play. Allison and I are looking for scary ass stories for our Halloween episode, so if you’ve got one, stick it in our inbox by e-mailing [email protected]!
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There Wasn’t Much Spooky Couture At The “Suspiria” Premiere
I’ve seen the original Suspiria from 1977 exactly one time, and now I’m officially scared of ballet, stained glass windows, loose piles of razor wire, and the prog-rock band Goblin. The remake starring Dakota Johnson comes out in theaters tomorrow, and the Los Angeles premiere was held last night in Hollywood. Luckily, the red carpet wasn’t nearly as terrifying as I was imagining it might be. Well, unless you count Dakota Johnson in a sequined second choice from the Dynasty wardrobe department as terrifying.
Ding Dong “Megyn Kelly Today” Is Dead (UPDATE)
Kathie Lee Gifford just told the full-time bartender in her dressing room to pull out the good stuff, because it’s time to celebrate now that it looks like the head bitches at NBC News are finally dumping the blonde reason for why the Happy Hour of Today (read: the fourth hour starring KLG and Hoda Kotb) is getting lower ratings. And then KLG will kick her leg, hop onto the cabaret stage she had built in her dressing room next to the bar, and belt out, “Grey skies are gonna cleeeeear up,” as her assistants ask the bartender for a stiff shot since they’re going to need it if their boss is starting off the day with show tunes.
Just a quick minute after Megyn Kelly dribbled out a canned apology for being a college educated 47-year-old former lawyer and “journalist” who has lived in New York City for years and didn’t know that blackface is racist, The Hollywood Reporter said that a source whispered in their ear about the demise of her show at Today. NBC News is reportedly going to put Megyn Kelly Today out of its misery at the end of this year. Megyn is currently in the middle of a $69 million three-year contract with NBC News. Cut to Black Santa sauntering up to Megyn to give her the gift of a pink slip this Christmas.