Two months ago the news broke that Shia LaBeouf and Mia Goth were expecting their first child together. Cut to this past Friday, when, according to People, the couple were spotted pushing a baby stroller around Pasadena. Their reps have yet to confirm the news, but it’s safe to assume the obvious: Mia popped a lil’ LaBeouf out of her Goth!
A few months ago, Shia LaBeouf was seen at a Chuck E. Cheese with a very pregnant-looking Mia Goth, and everyone automatically assumed the obvious. That Shia LaBeouf and Mia Goth were suffering from long-term tastebud loss, which is the only explanation for two adults choosing to eat the showbiz rat’s pizza. But aside from that, it also made people assume that Shia and Mia were expecting a baby. No confirmation on the subject has been made, until yesterday, when it was confirmed by People magazine that, yes, they’re expecting a baby.
…at Chuck E. Cheese’s. I didn’t want to add that little detail in the title, because there was already so much WTF energy going on up there. Shia LaBeouf is in the news today and it’s not because he was accused of doing something that would have producers second guess sending him audition sides. The last time Shia made headlines with baby-adjacent gossip news, it was way way way back in May 2020, after Shia was caught riding around on a bike fixed with a child-sized trailer to the back. People wondered if he was about to become a dad, but as time has proven, that wasn’t the case. Move aside, child-sized trailer, because this weekend we got a more obvious – and likely more accurate – clue about Shia’s possible paternity. And it came in the form of a large-bellied Mia Goth. That also means that Shia and Mia’s on-again/off-again situation is probably very much back on again.
Caught-on-camera celebrity purchases usually aren’t that suspicious or noteworthy. Sometimes a famous person just needs some attention…I mean, coffee. But Shia La Beouf was recently seen buying and riding around with a child trailer for the back of his bicycle. And of course, it hasn’t taken the internet very long to speculate on what that might mean.
Shia LaBeouf has been the cause of much embarrassment over the years. Between his Vegas wedding with Mia Goth that was live streamed on TMZ, cringey performance art projects, drunken rants ending in his arrest, and me somehow still thinking I would, Shia has caused more embarrassment to himself and others, than an accidental wet fart in a crowded elevator. But at least his tattoos were unremarkable. Well, not anymore! According to Page Six, Shia is back together with his ex Mia, and recently, showed off his extensive chest tattoos while the two were out exercising (with smoke breaks for Shia) in Pasadena, CA. The good news is he hasn’t tattooed his face (yet). The bad news is that Shia might be a Juggalo now. Or maybe that’s the good news! I don’t know, nothing makes sense in this world anymore.
I’ve seen the original Suspiria from 1977 exactly one time, and now I’m officially scared of ballet, stained glass windows, loose piles of razor wire, and the prog-rock band Goblin. The remake starring Dakota Johnson comes out in theaters tomorrow, and the Los Angeles premiere was held last night in Hollywood. Luckily, the red carpet wasn’t nearly as terrifying as I was imagining it might be. Well, unless you count Dakota Johnson in a sequined second choice from the Dynasty wardrobe department as terrifying.