Though Prince Harry and Meghan Markle‘s spokesperson described the recent New York paparazzi pursuit of them (along with Meghan’s mom, Doria Ragland) as a “nearly catastrophic” two-hour long, sometimes 80 mph car chase; the NYPD only called it “challenging,” Mayor Eric Adams said a chase of any length is very dangerous though he found it “hard to believe” it lasted two hours; and photo agency, Backgrid, said the trio was seemingly in “no immediate danger” from their paps but will be investigating further. But, we’ve finally gotten to hear from the most essential voice on any issue: Whoopi Goldberg, of course. On The View yesterday, she shed doubt on Harry and Meghan’s account of the situation, basically saying that her on-air fart smells and backtracking apologies after she farts out an offensive take travel faster than a car can in NYC traffic.
You know I love a good ol’ fashioned catfight and there might be one coming soon between Charlize Theron and Megyn Kelly. And in some weird way, this feels like a battle between the twins from The Parent Trap because they both look like cosplay versions of each other. It also doesn’t help that Charlize portrayed Megyn in the film Bombshell. But aside from that, Charlize made some supportive comments regarding the issue of kids and drag queens, telling the haters she will fuck them up if they feel otherwise. Being Hater #1, Megyn cracked her neck, pounded her fists together, and began to prepare for battle. Good luck with that, Megyn.
By now you must remember how Sharon Osbourne lost her gig on The Talk in March after she and her co-host Sheryl Underwood got into it on the show while talking about Meghan Markle and Prince Harry‘s interview with Oprah Winfrey. Sharon defended her longtime pal, Piers Morgan, over his comments about Meghan Markle and Sheryl and Sharon got into it about that. So Sharon has decided to rectify all of that by going on *checks notes* Megyn Kelly‘s SiriusXM show, and claiming that Sheryl had to complete “anger management” courses. Sharon also says that the female showrunners who fired her were “weak, weak women.” So in other words, Sharon Osbourne is still mad.
Because of the Black Lives Matter movement, Hollywood has finally started to make some changes and also take a Magic Eraser to racist messiness from its past. HBO Max put a disclaimer in front of Gone with the Wind, Tina Fey got the streamers to pull four episodes of 30 Rock with blackface in it, and Kristen Bell and Jenny Slate announced they were no longer going to voice Black cartoon characters. And now Disney-ABC has taken performative allyship to new levels of HUH? by coming for a “make” moment in The Golden Girls. They have pulled an episode over “blackface.” Megyn Kelly has said that she’s a huge fan of Golden Girls, so as a fan of both the show and also of blackface, this must really be something she feels passionately about.
Thanks to the Black Lives Matter movement, people have called for the banishment of statues of racists, HBO Max is including a special introduction about race with their showing of Gone with the Wind, Lady Antebellum changed their name to Lady A (or as we know them as, Lady Ay!LearnHowToFuckingGoogle), and now Quaker Oats is finally retiring Aunt Jemima for being a racist stereotype. “May we suggest that you just change her name to Aunt J?” said the re-branding experts known as Lady A(ntebellum).
Remember how Megyn Kelly almost died from a severe case of losing her shit over HBO Max temporarily removing Gone With The Wind? Well, a whole five days later and Megyn can finally un-bunch her shit-filled panties because it’s coming back. Oh but wait, it will now include an intro from a Black woman who will explain its “historical context.” Megyn’s shit-filled panties just bunched right back up!