Amy Schumer Says She Fired Her Doula For Being Too Beautiful
A whole bunch of employment lawyers might have heard that and started prepping for the wrongful dismissal suit of a lifetime. Meanwhile, any famous person whose marriage ever bit the dust over a nanny and a snake of a husband just nodded like, “Okay, tell me more.” But it’s not exactly like that, at least according to Amy Schumer herself. She didn’t just fire her doula simply because she was too busy hotting-it-up around Amy’s house to find the time to take care of Amy’s baby. No, it all comes down to self-esteem, which Amy says she didn’t have enough of to handle a pretty post-partum assistant.
Night Crumbs
Good news for ladies who gets the tingles something extra over a 91-year-old demonic billionaire turtle putting his cold lips on theirs right before he sucks the life out of them in exchange for the use of an AMEX Black Card, Rupert Murdoch’s single! Rupert and his fourth wife, 65-year-old Jerry Hall, are reportedly getting a divorce and will no longer steam up this world with their genuine love after six years of marriage. And as Jerry Hall Googles to see if one of the Koch Brothers is single, all of us are breaking up and divorcing are pieces, because everlasting true love is now a certified lie! – Insider
Bill Cosby was found liable by a civil jury for sexually assaulting a 16-year-old girl in 1975. The jury awarded the victim, Judy Huth, $500,000 in damages. And apparently, Cosby mouth-farted out, “What? That’s all? Booya!,” when he was told how much he had to pay because he thought he was going to be on the hook for millions. Cosby actually celebrating getting off “light” in a rape lawsuit should be all Lucifer needs to rename Hell’s Special Place to The Bill Cosby Wing – Jezebel
Martin Sheen Regrets Not Using His Real Name For His Acting Career
On August 3, 1940, Ramón Antonio Gerardo Estévez was born to Mary-Ann (from Ireland) and Francisco Estévez Martínez (from Galicia, Spain). That young boy would grow up to be actor Martin Sheen. Ramón became Martin near the beginning of his acting career, and, in a recent interview with Closer, the 81-year-old admits that anglicizing his name is “one of his regrets.” The other ones are all Charlie Sheen-related.
James Patterson Is Sorry For Saying That It’s “A Form Of Racism” When White Male Writers Can’t Find Work
Best-selling multi-millionaire author James Patterson caused us all to launch GoFundMes for Nicholas Sparks, Dan Brown, John Grisham, Dean Koontz, and the other older white male writers of the world when he said that the plight of the white male writer has veered into racism territory. James burped up the words “just another form of racism” when talking about white male writers, especially older white male writers, getting jobs. But I guess his PR team shouted in his ear, “You better apologize before Dolly Parton denounces you and you get banned from heaven FOREVER,” because James Patterson has apologized.
Hot Slut Of The Day!
The bedazzled strap-on that Xtina worked during her L.A. Pride performance!
While Azealia Banks Pride performance in Miami was exactly what you’d expect from an Azealia Banks Pride performance (read: a disastrous mess), across the country, Christina Aguilera delivered a highly successful performance at L.A. Pride. No, I barely watched a second of it, but I’m declaring that it was a hit for the simple fact that her performance included a guest appearance from a big, old, swinging bedazzled rubber dick. I’ve put it behind the cut just in case a sparkly dick that looks like it’s from Twilight‘s sex toy collection is NSFW for you.
Britney Spears Issued A Restraining Order Against Her Ex-Husband After He Tried To Crash Her Wedding
After many MANY hints that she wished to make an honest man out of Sam Asghari, Britney Spears finally married her beau. It was a special day for the two, filled with joy, happiness, and hopefully a Frapp or two. However, a certain ex-husband was none too pleased with the nuptials. No, not K-Fed. Mr. Popozao expressed that he and their sons Sean Preston and Jayden James were “happy” for Britney. The angry ex was Jason Alexander, Britney’s first husband, and childhood friend. He made his displeasure very known by crashing the party! The other Jason Alexander must be wondering why his Google Alerts are going crazy. He’ll have to adjust his settings to exclude “Britney ” and “crazy ex”!