Lil Wayne May Get A Pardon From Donald Trump
America is less than 24 hours away from being rid of Donald Trump as President, and you better believe that on his last day, he’s going to give out a few messy parting gifts. In a move that’s sure to piss even more people off before he takes a bow and his Brillo pad wig hits the floor, it’s believed that when he reveals his list of presidential pardons he will be extending that kindness to his “friend,” another celebrity with multiple baby moms, Lil Wayne, who pled guilty to federal firearms charges last December and is facing ten years in the clink.
Who Is Hot Slut Of 2020? Vote In Round Three!
Chang Wan-ji and Hsu Sho-er, the best duo to happen to fashion since Spandex biker shorts under shredded jean coochie cutters, has won the second round in the Hot Slut of the Year semifinals by getting about 39% of the votes. They will go on to the final round where they will battle for the HSOTY crown (read: an old Burger King crown with “Hot Slut” scribbled over “Burger” with a Sharpie) against the winner of round one, Leslie Jordan, and the winner of this round. Your choices for round three are:
September: Nomi Malone’s Ver-sayce Dress, the best thing that Versace has ever designed (JLo’s 2000 Grammys dress, who?!) because its timeless elegance caught the eye of Nomi Malone in Showgirls and became an icon of fashion and sophistication.
October: The Fly, the six-legged spotlight stealer who easily became the breakout star of the Vice-Presidential Debate when it landed on the field of white on the dome of cyborg Mike Pence and was later chosen as the new Secretary Of Agriculture by Joe Biden (just let me believe).
November: Grittney, the stunning British kin of Gritty who made all of Britain say, “Trump should lose an election more often,” when she lit up the streets and loins by celebrating Trump’s loss in an American flag bikini.
December: Dionne Warwick’s Twitter Account, the Twitter podium where noted hussynator and wisdom dispenser Dionne Warwick entertains her subjects and reveals important layers of herself, like her biggest regret being finding out why Armie Hammer was trending on Twitter. “Same,” said everyone.
Voting is below. The winner of the third round will be announced when voting starts in the final round on Thursday, January 21!
Some Think That Brie Larson Came Out In A YouTube Video
The Wrap says that the internet has been wondering “Is Brie Larson a gayelle or bisexual?” after she says in a YouTube video that as a child, she would Google, “Am I gay?” I actually never Googled that, I would just type in some male celebrity or soap opera star’s name and the word “shirtless.” Also when I was younger we all went to our names-dot-com and the website for Kristian.com used to link to a gay porn site and I was like “Oh…” So God pretty much let me know right away.
Anyway, as part of Brie’s YouTube channel, which she started to connect with fans during quarantine, she decided to film herself doing some internet quizzes. One of the quizzes was called “Which Lesser Known Brie Larson Character Are You?” and was designed by a Brie-stan who says in the very beginning of their quiz: “I am very gay and I love Brie Larson.” So that’s what to expect. And in one of the questions–“You’re ten years old, how do you spend an hour of recess?”–the options included a gay choice. And Brie picked it!
Brian Littrell Of Backstreet Boys Joined Parler, And Kevin Richardson May Have Sub-Tweeted About That
Buckle up teenage girls and gays of the 90s/2000s! There is some Backstreet Boys drama brewing, and it’s timely because it’s related to what’s going on politically in America. Fun combo! It seems that 49-year-old Kevin Richardson may have been subtweeting about his bandmate/actual cousin 45-year-old Brian Littrell who recently joined Parler, which is like Twitter for the far-right. QAnon is Larger Than Life, sweetie and Brian may be a subscriber.
Night Crumbs
Rob Lowe lives in Montecito, CA, and claims that he saw his neighbor Prince Hot Ginge in a car and PHG was working a ponytail. Um, I thought PHG’s head was a little slow in the “grow hair” department. So either he got plugs in the back of his head or is wearing a clip-on. Whatever the case may be, the people of Montecito better get some smelling salts. Because they’re going to need to sniff some to keep from fainting from the sight of the Ginger Stallion whipping his luxurious ginger ponytail before them – Lainey Gossip
After moving out of Prince Hot Ginge and Meghan Markle’s Frogmore Cottage, Prince Eugenie and her husband have moved in with her parents, Prince Andrew and The Original Fergie. Maybe everyone keeps FLEEING Frogmore Cottage because it’s haunted, but I don’t know, I’d rather live with a bunch of dark-sided spirits than dark-sided ghoul Prince Andrew – Celebitchy
This year, Netflix will release 70 new movies that I will add to “My List” and never watch them because I’d rather just watch Forensic File reruns over and over again – Pajiba
Hot Slut Of The Day!
The OG Ollie & Friends!
On Wednesday, while a mob of crazed Trump lovers took over the Capitol, Anderson Cooper was reporting on that shit show for CNN, and for some hurtful reason, decided to drag Olive Garden into it. The Silver Fox came out of the womb with a silver spoon (that definitely did not have Olive Garden deliciousness on it) in his mouth, so he thinks that Olive Garden is the official food of the trashy messes. Oh, Anderson, you better watch it, because Ollie & Friends are going to show up at your door to serve you some soup, salad, breadsticks, and a can of whoop-ass!