Category: Lawyer Up

Prince Harry And Meghan Markle Have Threatened To Sue Anyone Who Publishes Pictures Of Her Outdoor Hike

January 21, 2020 / Posted by:

Today, we saw some pictures of Meghan Markle taking a casual stroll around a park on Vancouver Island with 8-month-old Archie. She was accompanied by her and Prince Harry’s two dogs, and two security guards. Those pictures had steam coming out of my ears, because I was born in Ontario and never thought to move out west where it’s not negative-13 slush pile from November till May. Those pictures had Harry and Meghan pissed for a whole other reason. According to a letter published today by Harry and Meghan’s lawyers, those pictures shouldn’t have been taken in the first place. Continue reading

Brad Pitt’s Home Building Foundation Is Suing The Architect That Designed Their Katrina Houses

September 27, 2018 / Posted by:

In 2007, two years after Hurricane Katrina hit New Orleans, Brad Pitt launched the Make It Right foundation, the purpose of which was to rebuild houses for New Orleans’ Lower 9th Ward. The plan was to rebuild 150 safe, energy-efficient homes. What the Lower 9th Ward ended up with were houses that were made wrong; aka that were reportedly rotting, molding, and had bum plumbing and electrical. A lawsuit was threatened by a New Orleans attorney against Make It Right last month. Brad Pitt beat that lawsuit to the punch with his own lawsuit that Make It Right filed against the architect responsible for designing the houses.

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Justin Bieber And Hailey Baldwin Are Reportedly Negotiating A Prenup

September 22, 2018 / Posted by:

Hallelujah! The clouds have parted and a single ray of sunlight is shining brightly over Justin Bieber, because divine Hillsong intervention has worked for the first time in history and blessed him with a sprinkling of common sense. Despite Justin Bieber looking like a homeless tweaker in that picture above (“Only ‘looking’?” thought anyone who has seen THAT video), he’s worth millions. TMZ reports that The Biebs and Hailey Baldwin did not get secret married last week after being spotted obtaining their marriage license, because they are busy working out a prenup before they hit the gallows- I mean aisle. It’s a Hollywood miracle! A completely rational decision being made by two horny celebrity 20 somethings in a rush to get married. This brings a tear to my eye.

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Steven Spielberg Is A Menace To Puns And Fast Food Burgers

March 28, 2018 / Posted by:

Even if Steven Spielberg is a gazillionaire movie director, you best not try to capitalize off his name in punny tomfoolery, or he will come for you with a social media cease and desist! There’s nothing that gets me going like some wordplay, which is probably why I weighed 900 pounds as a kid from eating so many Cheesecake Factory “glamburgers.” Alas, Steven isn’t here for that, so he’s put the kibosh on a Carl’s Jr. burger that was to be named in his honor. Continue reading

Taylor Swift Has Pissed Off The ACLU For Trying To Silence A Critic

November 7, 2017 / Posted by:

The only person who likes Taylor Swift more than Taylor Swift is her lawyers; girl provides them with a lot of work. Taylor put her lawyers to work recently on a writer who wrote some things Taylor didn’t like regarding her popularity in the white supremacy community. Thanks to a little thing called free speech, that fight isn’t going so well for Taylor.

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Harvey Weinstein Is Preparing His Lawyers For A New York Times Exposé

October 5, 2017 / Posted by:

When you hear the name Harvey Weinstein, you might think, “Oh yeah, that guy who gets thanked a bunch in Oscar acceptance speeches.” Or, if you do a lot of gossip reading, you might think, “Oh yeah, that not-so-secret creep who can’t keep his hands to himself when he sees a pretty young model or actress.

It might not be much of a secret anymore. According to Variety and The Hollywood Reporter, The New York Times and The New Yorker are planning to release tell-all exposés about Harvey Weinstein, complete with some women who went on the record regarding his alleged grossness. Not surprisingly, Harvey has lawyered up.

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