I realize Dennis Rodman thought his influence on the international stage could help aid with the release of Brittney Griner in Russia, but that’s not happening. And not because he doesn’t have permission to enter the country, but mainly because the U.S. Government immediately told him to sit his ass down and let the professionals handle the work. And now, Dennis is forced to walk back all of his comments and have several seats, much like he should have done when he originally revealed his crusade.

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What the actual fuck ever happened to that vasectomy 41-year-old Nick Cannon claimed he had a consultation for?! Someone needs to stop this man from getting everyone in the neighborhood pregnant. It’s time for baby number 9, as Nick announced he and the mother of two of his other children, Brittany Bell, is pregnant with their third child. At least he’s circling back through Baby Mamas, but I guarantee you this man will crack a dozen babies and/or pregnancies by the end of the year. Maybe even a baker’s dozen!–I totally see him trying to squeeze in a few more fertilizations before 2023.

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Cardi B and her jackpot-hitting trophy husband Offset have taken to Twitter once again to engage in one of their favorite recreational activities: TWITTER WARS!! Of course, this is a sport Cardi holds all of the world records in like How To Complain The Most, AND How To Properly Drag Your Fans. And in this latest attempt at bringing home the gold, Cardi and her husband are joining forces to take down his former record label, Quality Control Music, as well as his former manager Pierre “Pee” Thomas (yes, “Pee“) as they try to slam Offset after he left their label to begin his inevitable solo career.

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It seems like every time we hear about HBO’s acclaimed saga of dongs, drugs, and dark rooms, Euphoria, it’s due to the excess of on-set drama that creator, Sam Levinson, allegedly perpetuates. A few months ago it was rumored that model/actress Barbie Ferreira, who plays Kat Hernandez on the show, wasn’t seeing sparkly lined eye-to-eye with Sam and his ideas for the direction of her character. Despite Kat having a dynamic storyline in season 1, her scenes were largely cut in season 2. And now, Barbie announced that she’s done with Euphoria for good.

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P.B. Crisps!

Sprinkled throughout the internet, you’ll find several “Bring P.B. Crisps!!!” petitions, and there’s even a full P.B. Crisps website devoted to begging Hormel Foods, the company that owns Planters, to bring back Mr. Peanut’s sweet creme-filled crisp. So there are many Crispheads out there who have been praying to the nut gods to please drop P.B. Crisps into their mouth holes once again!

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