Night Crumbs
Here’s Michelle Williams at the Louis Vuitton show during Paris Fashion Week and I am pretty sure that face is saying: “Yes, I am contractually obliged to wear the skin of a raver snake as a tit curtain.” – Lainey Gossip
RiRi, or the Star intern who made this story up, didn’t lie – Celebitchy
Bethenny Frankel is selling the Tribeca dream home she once shared with Jason Hoppy for $7 million. It looks great and you can’t even tell that Jason Hoppy (probably) once wrote “I HATE YOU BITCH” in his own shit on the walls – Reality Tea
Anna Kendrick really nailed the bored and medicated model pose in InStyle – Drunken Stepfather
Keifer Sutherland and booze shall never be parted – The Superficial
Lady Gaga released another song from her country-fied album and I don’t really mind it that much because it sounds like a B-side from The Heights official soundtrack – Towleroad
Eric the hairstylist from Finding Prince Charmless talked about telling Prince Charming and the other contestants that he’s living with HIV – POZ
Jessica Lange’s eyes got a serving of Evan Peters’ crotch huevos one time – OMG Blog
Emily Blunt wore a dress that a 90s bride would make her bridesmaids wear if she hated them – Popoholic
Let’s not do this again… It’s fucking green, duh! – SOW
Carrie Brownstein and Abbi Jacobson may be bumping nipples, or not – Jezebel
The Jeep dealership where Anton Yelchin bought his SUV has responded to his family’s wrongful death lawsuit by saying that he was responsible for his own death – Just Jared
Kylie Minogue and her hot bearded piece are engaged, but won’t get married until everyone in Australia can – Boy Culture
And what in polka dot mod sack HELL is Amal Clooney wearing? – Popsugar
Pic: Getty
James Haven Is The Child Army’s New Manny
Seen above giving off terrifying “Heeeeere’s Jimmy!” vibes in 2004, James Haven has reportedly been helping his sister Angelina Jolie with her 6 children as she deals with divorcing Brad Pitt. Uncle Stains is apparently at Angie’s rental house in Malibu every single day. The windows of that Malibu house must reach the edge of shattering when all 6 kids simultaneously scream, “Mom! Uncle! Gross,” after seeing Angie and James sloppily suck face.
Sean Penn Is Dating Vincent D’Onofrio’s 24-Year-Old Daughter
Ugh, why do I get the feeling that’s the same hand gesture Sean Penn makes when someone asks him if he’s dating another actor’s daughter. Just a lazy thumbs up followed by a smoker-voiced “Yeah, Sean Penn might be – wink.”
Open Post: Hosted By The Muppets Parody Of “Fifty Shades Of Grey”
“And this is where I leave you, bitch,” said absolutely everyone to the internet after finding out that a Muppets parody of Fifty Shades of Shit exists.
Some sick ho decided that what the over-used cum rag we know and love as the internet really needs is a Fifty Shades of Grey trailer starring Miss Piggy as Anastasia Steele and Kermit The Frog as Christian Grey. Every Muppet spends most of their life getting fisted by a human, so I guess it’s not a total stretch that Miss Piggy and Kermit would get into other kinds of kink too. Someone took the trailer for the first Fifty Shades of Shit movie and mashed it with clips from Muppets movies to create Fifty Shades of Muppets.
There’s one major problem with this. Anybody who has followed the messy and abusive union between Miss Piggy and Kermie knows that she’s as much of a sub as he is a dom. They should’ve switched roles and this shit should’ve been called Fifty Shades of Pork. Unless the makers of this know something we don’t know. I mean, maybe Miss Piggy is a dom in the streets and a sub in the sheets.
And this was made by the YouTube channel Darth Blender, so you can go ahead and send them the bills for the therapy you’ll need thanks to that still of Kermit holding the Vaseline while looking at you like, “Now bend over for Kermie.”
Olivia Newton-John Hates “Grease 2”
Show me a person who looks at that stunning work of art above and can honestly say that they hate the movie that made it possible, and I’ll show you a not-knowing trick whose opinion should never ever be trusted again! And one of those tricks is Olivia Newton-John.
Kristen Stewart And St. Vincent Might Be A Thing
A little over two months ago, Kristen Stewart was back with her on-and-off again girlfriend Alicia Cargile. Kristen and Alicia’s lesbian hipster paradise love may have come to an end, and Kristen may have already moved on. And according to the Daily Mail, that someone may be Cara Delevingne’s former someone, St. Vincent.