Category: #metoo
Jamie Foxx Blames The State Of Comedy For Why We Might Not Ever See His 2016 Film “All-Star Weekend” In Which Robert Downey Jr. Plays A Mexican Man
As Variety reports, Jamie Foxx says his 2016 directorial feature debut, All-Star Weekend, a comedy starring Foxx and Jeremy Piven as “two best friends who win tickets to the annual NBA event” whose road trip to LA is “upended by a handful of wacky characters,” might never be released due to the “current state of comedy.” Jamie apparently doesn’t think we can handle a wacky character like “Mexican Stranger,” played by Robert Downey Jr. Alas, it seems the so-called woke mob has struck again. First, they came for The Alamo, but I was not a history major and am unclear on how exactly that played out— so I said nothing. Then they came for Señor Frog’s Cinco de Mayo $2 margarita special, but I did not have one near me— so I said nothing. Then they came for my Mexican pizza and I said, OH HEEEEELL NO!— And they brought it back. So obviously the point here is that if Jamie wants All-Star-Weekend to ever see the light of day, he needs to recast “Mexican Stranger” with Doja Cat and do some reshoots.
Kevin Spacey Pleaded Not Guilty To Sexual Assault Charges In London And Is Being Replaced In The Genghis Khan Movie
Welp. It’s back to the drawing board for whichever Mongolian graphic design firm created the poster for the Genghis Khan movie 1242: Gateway to the West starring Kevin Spacey because he’s not going to be in it after all. Variety reports that even though Kevin has just pleaded not-guilty to the sexual assault charges filed against him in London last month, Gateway the West’s producers apparently feel that Kevin playing innocent would be more of a stretch for audiences than him playing an 11th century Roman Cardinal. Luckily for the design team, they can easily Photoshop James Franco’s head onto Kevin’s body in the poster should he be offered the greatest post-#MeToo comeback role of the year. Unless reportedly broke Armie Hammer goes for it. In which case, we’ve got ourselves a real race for Best Acting Man at the 2023 Gödöllő Moving Photograph And Goulash Festival.
James Franco Will Return To Acting In The Post-WWII Movie “Me, You”
Operation Replace James Franco With His Brother Dave worked for a while, but has been ultimately unsuccessful. According to The Hollywood Reporter, James Franco is poised to make his big-screen comeback after his star-unmaking turn in Four Years a Canceled. James is set to star in a “post-World War II coming-of-age drama” called Me, You by Danish director Bille August alongside Brits Tom HollandER (not to be confused with Mr. Zendaya) and Daisy Jacob. The film is set on the Italian island of Ischia off the coast of Naples and is set to begin filming, on location, in September. This is great timing for James as Kevin Spacey was unable to commit due his busy legal calendar.
Beyoncé Reportedly Ran #MeToo Checks On Collaborators On Her New Album “Renaissance”
You may remember a little song called Drunk in Love from Beyoncé’s 2013 self-titled album Beyoncé. Welp, producer Detail (government name: Noel Fisher) was later arrested in August 2020 and charged with raping five women and sexually assaulting a sixth between the years of 2010 and 2018. Noel has denied the accusations, but Beyoncé is not going to have some shit like this come out again about someone who makes a hit for her. So much so that everyone who worked on her new album, Renaissance, which comes out on July 29, got the once-over and was checked for skeletons in their closet. I’m sure that Beyoncé has been doing these checks on people since her sister Solange had to square up with her husband Jay-Z on that elevator after he allegedly banged Rachel Roy–OR Rachael Ray, depending on who you ask. Can’t surprise Beyoncé twice!
R. Kelly Has Been Sentenced To 30 Years In Prison
Just four years ago, Robert Sylvester Kelly was bragging that it was too late to prosecute him for any alleged crimes because, not only was he adored by “40 billion motherfuckers,” but they “should have did this shit thirty years ago” before his music had “been injected into the world.” Speaking of lethal injections, Robert won’t be administered one for the crimes of racketeering and sex trafficking that he was convicted of last September in New York. However, according to Page Six, he will be serving a 30-year sentence for them. Oopsie daisy! Turns out it wasn’t too late to #MuteRKelly after all. Today, Robert was sentenced to serve 30 years for one count of racketeering and eight counts of violating the Mann Act which “prohibits the transport of ‘any woman or girl across state lines for any ‘immoral purpose’.” Thanks to vaccines and the dozens of brave women (45 witnesses testified!) who came forward to share their experiences, 40 billion motherfuckers have been cured!
Aziz Ansari Married His Forensic Data Scientist Fiancée
Last December, Aziz Ansari announced during one of his stand-up shows that he was engaged to his girlfriend, Swedish forensic data scientist, Serena Skov Campbell. Does a “forensic data scientist” ever get tired of being introduced as a “forensic data scientist?” She better get used to it; it’s probably going to keep happening since the number of people in the celeb stratosphere with bona fide brains seems to dwindle lower and lower. But now, we can pop some of Aziz’s Parks & Recreation character Tom Haverford’s SnakeJuice, because Aziz and Serena were recently married in Italy.