They reanimated Red Carpet Angelina Jolie and trotted her around the globe like a prized thoroughbred (they even tried to give her a real horse-hair mane!) for the premiere of Eternals and for what? The early reviews are in and it’s unanimous — It’s no Dune!
The most maternal of all the Eternals, Angelina Jolie, brought the entire child army save 17-year-old Pax to her Marvel premiere last night, in case you were wondering who the child army’s favorite parent should be. (Hint: it’s the one who lets them root through her closet and takes them to fancy red carpet events) According to People, Maddox, 20, Zahara, 16, Shiloh, 15, and twins Vivienne and Knox, 13, all joined Angie on the red carpet for the Hollywood premiere of Marvel’s Eternals, and Zahara wore the same Elie Saab gown Angie wore to the 2014 Academy Awards. Do you think Brad Pitt is going to let any of those rugrats touch his precious hat collection?! Not a chance.
The Game of Thrones family is going to have another posh-speaking British person joining the fold. Pocket prince Kit Harrington, with his perpetual “oh no” face and tightly curled mop, managed to do the unthinkable: he got his wife, Rose Leslie, pregnant. Yep, another pandemic baby is upon us, because what else is there to do besides fuck, moisturize your luscious locks with a hair mask (if you’re Jon Snow), and fuck?
Some days we must take the little blessings where we can find them, for they are to be treasured above all else. Today’s little blessing is a scowly, pint-sized, freshly shorn beefcake in skintight light wash denim jeans, walking a silly dog in a puffer vest. I call him Klit Harrytongue, but his mama calls him Kit Harington and today we are #blessed
If your pandemic television binging includes finally watching all of Game of Thrones, then be warned: *winter spoilers is coming*. Also, lucky you! Get ready for plenty of titties, bums, and dragons. Followed by a meh final season that co-starred a Starbucks cup and two (TWO!) water bottles.
Emilia Clarke, aka Daenerys Targaryen, First of Her Name, Breaker of Chains, Mother of Dragons, and Victim of Illogical Last Minute Character Development, had some shit to say about the show’s ending in an interview with The Times.
For the past month, it seems you couldn’t open your eyes without someone going on about Game of Thrones, whether it be about how much they’ll miss it when it ends, or how much the creators of the show are fucking it up and that fans deserve a re-do. It was the most stressful end to a show since Tony Soprano ruined both onion rings and a Journey song for us. Kit Harington has reportedly been feeling the pressure over the end of Game of Thrones, because he’s checked himself into a rehab facility to deal with it, as well as some alcohol issues.