Category: Trailers
Open Post: Hosted By The Trailer For “The Staircase” Starring Toni Colette And Colin Firth
Last year, Mare of Easttown made Kate Winslet the undisputed dahhhling of the HBO Max season (though White Lotus’ Jennifer Coolidge was a close 2nd) but since it takes HBO a million years (or approximately 3 GOT dragon lifetimes) to crank out a new season of appointment television, there’s an opening for Toni Collette to nab the title this year. Variety reports that Toni will be starring opposite Colin Firth in The Staircase, a limited series based on the Netflix documentary of the same name. That is unless Nicole Kidman’s wig from The Undoing will be playing the possibly murderous owl, in which case, all bets are off. Nic is such a powerful performer, that even her leftover hairpieces masked in “bird face,” are put forward For Your Consideration. For those of you who haven’t seen the Netflix documentary and think I’ve totally lost my marbles, I’m referencing the “owl theory,” which I’ll explain later. Right after I’m done looking for my marbles. I know I put them somewhere…
Here’s The Duke Of Hastings-Free Trailer For Season 2 Of “Bridgerton”
Since Regé-Jean Page’s buttcheeks won’t even get out of bed for $50,000 per episode, season two of Shonda Rhimes’ Netflix hit Bridgerton contains exactly zero scoops of The Duke of Hastings’ pudding. Instead, the second season will focus on Lord Anthony Bridgerton’s butt, or bar(r)ing that, his wet torso at the very least. Jonathan Bailey’s Anthony Bridgerton returns as Netflix’s most eligible bachelor if we don’t count* Kanye or Shake from Love is Blind 2. *we don’t
Open Post: Hosted By The Trailer For “The Unbearable Weight Of Massive Talent” Starring Nicolas Cage As Nicolas Cage
His hairline? High and tight. His beard? Trimmed and dyed to perfection. With clear eyes and full heart, Nicolas Cage simply cannot lose playing the role he was born to play— Himself. Move over John Malkovich, there’s a new enigmatic self-deprecating/depicting loony-toon on the scene and he’s struggling with (and starring in!) The Unbearable Weight of Massive Talent. Well, actually on second thought, get in here, John! We need a Con Air reunion stat!
Open Post: Hosted By “The Baby,” HBO’s New Show About A Murderous Infant Who Falls From The Sky
The 1988 camp classic Killer Klowns from Outer Space is getting a horrifying update. Killer Klowns just don’t pack the same punch as they used to, thanks in part to the upstanding way Violent J and Shaggy 2 Dope of Insane Clown Posse have comported themselves these past few years. Scary clowns jumped the shark when Kanye ran for president. Now they’re just sad. Nowadays, the thing that curdles the blood and jellies the knees are killer babies from outer space. That’s the premise of The Baby, a new horror/comedy series from HBO and Sky, set to premiere in late April. The only baby scarier than The Baby’s cherubic psycho killer is Bhad Bhabie, and the only baby who’s more grotesque is DaBaby. However, Boss Baby remains in a ghastly class of his own.
Open Post: Hosted By The Trailer For The Trailer For “Bullet Train” Starring Brad Pitt
Bullet Train starring Brad Pitt is out this July, and so it’s that time for Sony Pictures to start shoving all things Bullet Train down our throats, starting with a teaser trailer for a trailer for a movie. But this one’s a little different. You see, it’s a commercial for the train company from the movie, Nippon Speed Line, and Brad narrates it, letting us know that on March 2, we’ll see an actual trailer.
Here’s The First Trailer For Baz Luhrmann’s “Elvis” Starring Austin Butler
It’s been almost three years since relative newcomer Austin Butler was announced to star in Elvis, Baz Luhrmann’s Elvis Presley biopic. At the time he won the role it was down to him, Ansel Elgort, and Miles Teller. Ansel went on to jinx West Side Story at the box office while ducking accusations of sexual misconduct, and Miles went on to star in Top Gun 2: Never Gonna Happen and get punched by a wedding planner while partying with Aaron Rodgers in Hawaii. So it looks like they made the right choice. But after seeing the trailer, I’m not so sure they made the right choice in casting Tom Hanks as Elvis’ manager Colonel Tom Parker, a role that clearly should have gone to Jared Leto based on the sheer amount of prosthetics they plastered on him to play a man nobody even knows or cares what he looked like anymore.