Director Danny Boyle already shot his shot with James Bond and hit nothing but rim, but that’s not stopping him from dream-casting subsequent Bonds after Daniel Craig hangs up the tuxedo and Speedo for good. Danny’s dream Bond is soon-to-be Batman Robert Pattison. That’s a long shot, even if the franchise manages to survive the probably cursed Bond 25 production that Danny was originally hired to be direct before leaving over “creative differences” (maybe he tried to replace Daniel with a Jonas Brother or something). But then again, Robert has a better chance of becoming Bond at this point than Idris Elba, a woman, or Michael Jackson. So maybe Danny’s on to something.
The Hollywood Reporter says that not everyone is mad about Robert Pattinson being cast as Batman in The Batman. It was announced he got the role and like all things on the internet these days, people were divided. Well it seems like Batman-devotees who found Robert to be too much of a teeny-bopper really underestimated the sway that same teeny-bopper community has over the casting decisions of Hollywood movies, because it seems that the youth are huge supporters of The RBattz. a
Looks like the people who are working on the next Batman movie, called The Batman, really thought to themselves: “Hmmm, how can we piss off literally every single fan boy who we haven’t already alienated after Ben Affleck?” Well the brainstorming session has been completed and it was a rousing success! After it was rumored that Robert Pattinson and Nicholas Hoult were the last two left for the role, it looks like Warner Bros. has approved RBattz!
I’ve included this picture of Michelle Pfeiffer not to tease you into the false hope that Hollywood has made a good decision by casting her again as Catwoman. I chose it because it’s a great way to remind Hollywood that they can’t do any better for Catwoman, but bless their hearts for continuing to try (sorry, Halle Berry and Anne Hathaway). According to Collider, Catwoman’s next big screen appearance will be alongside The Penguin in The Batman.
When Ben Affleck made it clear that he’s not going to be Batman again, a rumor sprang up that we were going to get a smug pretty boy hunk Batman in the form of Armie Hammer. That proved to be untrue. But during the conversation about Armie Hammer, it came up that the next Batman, appearing in the upcoming The Batman, would most likely be played by a younger actor. And then it was rumored back in February that Robert Pattison will scowl and grunt at villains through that cheap rubber mask. And now, according to several sources, that’s going to happen.
Fran Lebowitz and filthy pretend-shorts-hater Justin Theroux are somewhere screaming at their assistants to keep pouring the gallons of eyewash into their seeing globes after their retinas, corneas, and all that other shit that make up the eye were burned by the disgusting sight of man legs in shorts. It disgusts them almost more than my phone getting infected by a Presidential Alert disgusts me. Yes, I’m dipping my phone in liquid antibiotics as I type this.