The New Trailer For “The Batman” Shows More Of Zoë Kravitz’s Catwoman

There’s a new trailer out for Matt Reeve‘s The Batman starring Robert Pattison and Zoë Kravitz that includes 20% more Catwoman than the previous trailer, and I’m reeling from what I just saw. I expect Catwoman to have a chic bob and a smokey eye, but not The Batman! But then again, RPattz ain’t your grandfather’s Batman. Or your father’s Batman for that matter. Nor is he your older sibling’s Batman. He’s not even your own Batman from just a couple of years ago. No, RPatz’ Batman is an evolved batperson in possession of a much wider range of emotions, from darkly brooding to glumly seething, but that’s not the only change. Rob’s Batman went to the salon and told his stylist, “give me the Velma Kelly, I’m in the mood for some Le Hot Jazz!”

Slashfilm declares “Robert Pattinson is the new Batman, and he’s not playing around,” but as far as I can tell from this dark ass trailer, that’s all he’s doing. He and Catwoman are literally just romping in the dark wearing silly costumes and cracking pussy jokes. But apparently, RPattz is meant to be channeling Kurt Cobain for his Batman, “specifically, it’s inspired by the Kurt Cobain-like figure in Gus Van Sant’s Last Days,” which by extension means Zoë’s Catwoman must be channeling Courtney Love. Ergo the pink wig and shoddy housekeeping. Basically, toxoplasmosis but make it fashion. Here’s the trailer.

I’m sorry, I think they must have accidentally mislabeled this video because this is clearly a trailer for season 4 of True Detective. The Riddler (Paul Dano) is all “Hello Mister Batman, I gave you all the clues.” As for the Selina of it all, she’s very short. That’s my main takeaway. The “cat” in Catwoman is a Munchkin who sadly will never get munched. Not by Batman. But if she’s lucky, she can have a little salami, as a treat.

Pic: YouTube